lucylee wrote:Sock it to 'em. Indeed.
(I'm just kidding y'all -- I'm not mad at any of you, and I agree that you all make valid points in J&C! I just respectfully disagree, at this point in time.)
But, go ahead, join in the nagging and suggesting, Harriet. (See J&C.)
I haven't been to J&C yet but I suspect I might be in the middle of this!
Long day so far, this is my first chance at a keyboard.
Got up a bit late, decided to s2s first, then eat, got listening to a podcast and started to pull out clothes for the trip. Then dd called to ask if I'll host dgs birthday party with adults (yes, of course) and then I realized I only had 20 minutes to eat, dry and style hair, and get off to church. We were 2 minutes late and that was due to missing the first elevator (it was full of people so we had to let it go without us.)
Church was OK, a lay leader who lead fine but her message demonstrated her research but not her ability to put it to good use. The soloist was wonderful as was the scripture reader. The organist was over-the-top as usual which dh hates and I love. He postlude was completely done ab lib, based on the final hymn and interpreting the scripture.
After church was a 2:15 long meeting about the NFs transitioning to life without our financial support. It was depressing because they are not going to do well. I had met with them over finances and budgeting last November (and got my knuckles rapped for that) because they were worried about finances. At that time (and I had an interpreter) I explained that they needed to save up enough money by September 1 to start paying their rent every month. In May they started to talk about moving and actually went so far as to give notice. So the other committee members helping them with transition assumed the last month's rent would be a non-issue so didn't remind them or explain. Then they discovered they could find nothing better anywhere else in the city so now we are 17 days from when they owe $1070 for their apartment (which, thankfully, their landlord said they could stay in.)
Anyway, I'm hardhearted and don't think we should pay September's rent (especially since I started talking about this last November and was told it wasn't my place to do so) partly because they are in a position to do so (it will be tough but they have enough money this month and next, before welfare kicks in and they'll be destitute.) My suggestion was to let them struggle for the next two months and then step in if necessary when they are destitute but the committee over-ruled me.
I am to go in on Wednesday with an interpreter and the chair of the committee and explain, physically, with Monopoly money, how tough a situation they are in. Words and charts with numbers aren't enough. Our last bit of financial support will be paid out on September 1. From that point onwards (with over $1000 in cash from us and their rent paid) they will have a month to get their act together. NFD earns $750 a month and they get $1100 from the government for child benefits. Their rent will be $1070. Not easy but doable considering they have all the things they need to get through the winter.
The other issue is that because they aren't moving, NF11 will change schools but the same social element will be in the new school. So will she go to school? Legally the school is supposed to report too many absences to Children's Aid who will intervene but her school last year did not do so (probably because it would shine a light on their poor handling of bullying and classroom control.) So she thinks she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to. Because she won't go to school, mother won't go to language classes and the whole family is being held back by an 11-year old. If she doesn't get her way, she has screaming fits. Which generated complaints from neighbours and a warning that they'd be evicted. So they placate her to keep her quiet.
I'm thinking this is a big country and perhaps we should rent a cabin somewhere and let her scream for a bit until we get the upper hand with her once more. It shouldn't take more than a week to do that. But then again, I'm cruel and seriously into tough love.
Anyway, dh was anxious to get back to work so we skipped lunch out at the diner (sigh, that was my light at the end of the long tunnel of meeting) and I had a scrambled omelet for my lunch at 2. Ribs are on in the crock pot for dh and I'm having a veggie and chicken stir fry for my dinner. So at least dinner is planned.
Now that I have many to-do's this week for the family, I need to get packed and ready to go on the trip. My appointment with the family will be Wednesday afternoon or evening. We leave on Thursday by 9 a.m. (preferably 8.)