Thoughtful and thankful Thursday

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

Breathe.

Think.

Be intentional, not reactive.

There is upheaval for several of us in the village today.

Be thankful that you have us as a sounding board, a place to get rants out of your system, a place to share memories as you process what is happening, and a place to just be; knowing that you are surrounded by love and caring hearts while you process what's happening.

In particular,

(((Nancy)))

Many of us have been there so we'll sit with you, as you process your thoughts and memories.

[blessedw2]

(((Nancy)))

Many of us have been there so we'll sit with you, as you process your thoughts and memories - Kathryn.

agree 150%

[blessedw2]

d kathryn Wonderful beginning- thoughtful!
feeling thankful!

[blessedw2]

today is my out of the house day - errands

dh has agreed to help me with doing weeklies on one room each day except for weekends. I will see if he follows through - he really balks sometimes - he definitely dislikes routines - except his own putzing routines

I will pull my errands and put them in order so I am not driving all over the place

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

I'm up.

Another busy day although today I'll be away from internet a lot. Whether that is good or bad will be seen.

My co-sponsor responded to my email with a rant that accused us of doing NOTHING until now and saying NOTHING about how we wanted to control the money. I didn't think it was necessary, that was the plan as spelled out in the memo of understanding. She also complained that they did all the work and raised all the funds without any help from the church. Again, as spelled out in the memo of understanding.

My minister (who is cc'd on these emails because he's named in the MOU) before that email had come responded to me alone with an email saying "There's a back story, don't bother explaining, I trust you." (Isn't he wonderful?!?!)

Then after the accusing email, he responded with "Say nothing, I will deal with this in the morning."

I then sent him and the chair of our board a copy of the MOU pointing out the clauses that were important and pointing out that we also held a $35,000 promissory note for all the funds so if they fell short of the fundraising, they would personal be responsible for coming up with the money for the sponsorship. Her complaint about the fact that we didn't kick in money as we were to do, is bogus, and we have proof.

The final email from my minister was to ask for full financial details. Moneywise we are fine. The group did what was required of them and raised $57,000 which is in the church's bank account. Financially, we don't need them at all. That's why I haven't pushed the fact that they fund-raised and withheld the funds from us. No-one wanted charitable contribution receipts for that money, so I let it go.

We do need them to work for the settlement, though (as covered in the MOU.) There will 1 - 2 weeks of 8 hours a day with the refugees, then 2 - 3 days a week and finally 4 days a month. And that's because they have English and should be in reasonable health. The NFs, after 14 months, are still getting 2+ days a week of support (spread over an active team of 8, with 17 in total to call on for rides, etc.)

If the other group fully pulls out, then all that work will fall to me alone. There is no-one else available at the churches, that is specifically why the MOU is written the way it was. The co-sponsors agreed to do all the work in exchange for the church being a fast-track to getting the refugees here (we have a special arrangement with the government because we will be supporting the refugees financially and emotionally for one year.) and so that people would get charitable donation receipts for the money. As well, another charity donated $$$$$ to our church for the refugees because we were a registered charity working to help refugees.

W & R have been put in an apartment that is 40 minutes away from the churches and 20 minutes away from me, solely for the convenience of the co-sponsors, because they are the ones to work with them on a daily basis.

We'll see what happens. At this point we are trying to keep this all from W & R because they are caught in the middle. The other team are their peers and they've become friends over social media over the 19 months we've been working to get them here. We've become W & Rs aunt and uncle. Dh role is as W's father, uncle, brother, to guide and advise him (W's words.)

It will be an unsettled day.

It is also my senior friend's 80th birthday so after dh's dental surgeon appointment, (to check on healing) we are off to see her.

We'll drop a load of things at the apartment and then come home and shelter. There's a weather advisory for today - rain during a temperature plummet towards 0 so we are looking at freezing rain and then snow overnight. Tomorrow morning, at 7:45, is a our biggest moving day. Sigh....

Off to s2s and have breakfast. We leave here in 90 minutes.

[blessedw2]

yes, he knows you and respects you - it says so much about both you and your pastor d kathryn

I hope it won't be an unsettled day d kathryn. I hope you have a great productive and happy day

[blessedw2]

time to pull the cards - I did nothing on my card file! But I did take a shower and s2s

I made my list for errands

I have an appointment for d mom today at 1:00 I have to pick her up at noon as it takes about 45 minutes to get there .

have a great day everyone.

heading out!

[LadyMaverick]

Be thankful that you have us as a sounding board, a place to get rants out of your system, a place to share memories as you process what is happening, and a place to just be; knowing that you are surrounded by love and caring hearts while you process what's happening.

Well said! I am so very thankful for this special place to come to and process life events.

Today is typical Thursday with 2 extra events
6am - DGD6 arrive, fed breakfast and hair combed
7:45 - DGD6 to school
8-11am Homeschool
11 - 1pm Public school for DS9 to spend time with friends, speech therapy & Volunteer duties
2pm - DS9 appt for consultation with chiro/acupuncture
3pm - My appt with chiropractor
3:45 DGD6 from school

B: Hot Mess
L: hamburger patty & green salad (at school)
D: Goulash

Yesterday's experiment with planning & gathering all my food for the day was a total success. The visual aspect of it was what helped me the most. And already making the decisions so I wasn't deciding yes/no on each food possibility throughout the day. It helped me in soooo many decisions.
** Last night a DFriend arrive for meal at church and made a bee-line me. She was so excited to show me her effort (Pumpkin cookies & icing made into Moonpies). With great delight in her eyes, she held the platter out to me for me to take one and try. There was no way I was going to disappoint her. I took one and tasted it and told her what I liked about it. I held the double cookie/icing in my hand with one bite out of it while we discussed how she made them. She was so pleased that I like them. Confession: When she turned her back to go put the dish on the dessert serving area, I started working on something and when I was sure no one could see, I dropped the cookie/icing into the trash. They were VERY good but not worth ruining my food plan.
** Last night a DFriend who struggles physically came and asked me to help cut her pies. I cut the pies and put them on serving plates for her. She stood there while I did it and insisted the last piece of pie in each pie plate was for me. She also wanted me to take the pie plates home as a gift. ARGH!!! How to graciously turn down a gift? We negotiated and decided that we would each that one of her pie plates home. While talking I dished up the remaining piece of pie to sit out on the dessert table and I don't think DFriend noticed that the pie plate she gave me was empty. I took it to the kitchen and washed it immediately. I am hoping she assumed I got a piece of pie from the dessert table later.
** Last night DSis asked - Did you try my banana pudding? I said No, I didn't get any of that. She said "Give it a try and tell me what you think of it". ARGH. So that lead me to eat one teaspoon of banana pudding so I could give DSis feedback.
If I hadn't already made the decision to not eat desserts I would have easily eaten 3 different desserts last night. As it was I had a small taste of each dessert so I could give feedback and interact with DFriends & DSis. I don't think anyone noticed that it wasn't more.

[Harriet]

I was thinking how much Kathryn and Harmony have in common today. We're all willing to work and (as said the other day by a dcousin who volunteered to stand in the rain all election day) we would hope some part of our work is always "altruistic" (out of unselfish concern). However, we really need others to pay attention to agreements and stop being bat-crazy.

LadyM, your experience at the covered dish is so universal. It's a wonder anyone in the US has the slimness or fitness they normally would. Sounds like you handled it all with grace.

HRH is here through the morning. We were stepping all over each other in the kitchen for breakfast. lol. We eat similarly, but each is disappointed in what the other one likes for breakfast, lol. He's so suspicious of what may lurk in my oatmeal! Usually we don't even know about it, but today my timer was in the way of his, etc.

He is so hopeful that the new way the office is set up is going to be helpful for me, especially. There's just still so much moving around that needs to be done. Just envisioning that there will sometime be clear spaces is not helping when all the work needs to be spread out now.

I didn't tell ya'll that we finally had the expected visit and the new baby came. Dstepgd brought her grandmother from the other side with her - brought her in right through my laundry and kitchen by surprise. I came through the other way wondering what the noise was, only to run into a woman I didn't recognize, and both of us embarrassed. Dstepgd said "I told him I was coming!" (meaning HRH). Yes, dear, you twice told him you would be here at times that passed 2 and 4 days ago. Anyway, HRH and I dropped everything, and did enjoy the visit.

I was loud and clear that dstepgd needs to plan visits with her parents, and HRH should just be invited along to their family times. She started up with how she couldn't reach them ( ! ) and HRH was right on it, explaining their work schedule (which she already knows full well). In fact, much of the visit was spent with 3 adults contradicting her excuses. First words of many sentences out of her grandmother's mouth would be "noooooo... ..." and then the facts of whatever the subject was. So much growing up needs to be done, but I was delighted to see the baby is healthy, happy and alert.

[Elizabeth]

Good morning! Board meeting done! Chinese dinner consumed afterward. Not much else was done, but that is ok, that was the plan. I did finish the computer jigsaw, but that too was a 30 minute planned break. We decided to have the animal org holiday party at someone else's house. Most of the dog people live on the eastside and I am westside. The other house is more centrally located. This means I won't have the kick in the pants to keep mine clean. Dad is coming in March, that will have to do. I woke up to a cat fight 10 minutes before the alarm went off. Unfortunately, Geezer Kitty was on top of me and went flying. This didn't matter in her healthier days, but it worries me now. I figured out a way to get two pills in her at once, so she doesn't hate me more than she already does.

Today, I have many DPCs, but I think the numbers are at home. I have not heard from the person I need to see Sunday to transport a cat.

Tomorrow is both payday and a holiday. I will start with the Friday knit/crochet group that I rarely get to see now. Other things I want to get done are oil change and haircut. I guess I should do B&B tonight while DD15 studies. Finals are tomorrow and Monday, it is easy to predict her activities tonight. Christmas crafts need to be my main focus now.

I'm thinking of Nancy and her family.

WTG Kathryn on yesterday's email.

CathyS has my sympathy on past experience with a nitpicky x. I have learned that FlyLady is right - perfectionism is evil. As long as a perfectionist believes you are perfect, all is well. But seriously, who can maintain that illusion? Once they realize you are not perfect, you become worthless in their eyes, there is no middle ground. Of course, everything they do is the "right way". Young girls should be told of this danger. Boys too!