Friday Focus

The daily PWYC thread, where we gather to keep in touch, keep accountable and keep motivating each other.
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Kathryn-in-Canada
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Friday Focus

Postby Kathryn-in-Canada » Fri Oct 05, 2018 8:48 am

What will you be focusing on today?

Not just what part of the home, but what are you working through with your brain. My brain, at least, is never focusing on just one thing!

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Kathryn-in-Canada
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Kathryn-in-Canada » Fri Oct 05, 2018 8:58 am

I just had a terrible thought that it wasn't Friday, but it is.

I miss knowing what day it is without having to think hard.

Dd wrote this morning asking for babysitting tomorrow. I said no. I have 2 days without any outside activities. It looks like a lovely day for a walk along the river but aside from that, I'm going to try to stay away from any people by hiding in the apartment.

I still have to finish cleaning up from Wednesday. I did all the prep dishes before leaving that day except for the bowl with the stuffing. Yesterday, before leaving with ds, I managed to get all the soup stuff and the dishes from that day into the dishwasher and I ran it with literally 12 items (including a spoon.) They were all huge and doing that meant the kitchen went from being overwhelmed with things that needed washing, to just the stuffing bowl (which is too big for the dishwasher) and my crock pot lid (which I couldn't remember if it was dishwasher safe.)

Of course, now there's my dinner dishes from yesterday and, once I have it, my breakfast dishes.

Dfs called 20 minutes ago to let me know that Iris has arrived! She finally showed up at 6 a.m. my time and is adorable. Dfsw (his wife, I need an acronym for her) looks fabulous too and you'd never know she had been up for 30 hours. I'll go visit Sunday or Monday.

So they will be my happy thought while working around today.

I'm terrified of this trip because I don't know if my brain can handle it and if it can't, I'll be stuck. I suspect that anxiety is one of the side-effects of a concussion along with frustration, anger and tears. Tears, right now, are an appropriate response, though, both of sadness and empathy for my cousin and joy at the thought of dfs's new family.

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bittersweet
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby bittersweet » Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:33 am

Focus on one thing?? Good one, Kathryn!! :lol:

Congratulations to dfs & dfsw! New arrivals are always worth celebrating!

Things will be busy here today. I need to leave by 11am to do some shopping for dMum, deal with a few chores around her place, and take her for a bone density scan appointment this afternoon. Then we'll hit up the A & W on the way home for a mama burger and fries. First, though, I need to get some stuff done around here (including a nap, since I woke up after only three hours sleep last night :roll: )

Round #1:


- put away clean dishes
- refill meds for the week
- cat box #1
- take meat out for supper
- swish & swipe bathroom
- put/throw away 10 things from dining room table
- refresh Sc*ntsy


POOF!!
"Write it on your heart that every day is the best day of the year." Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Twins' Mom
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Twins' Mom » Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:42 am

Kathryn, I feel for you needing to travel and not feeling your best.

Just before I opened up my computer to this village, I was thinking "I've lost my focus" about my KDP (Kinship Determination Project) 'cause I don't know that I can refute the conflicting evidence. I don't know what I believe, myself, about this issue at this point. I was convinced a few days ago 'cause I knew I couldn't account this daughter but not now. Was Mary E born 1841 the same person as Elizabeth born 1846-1849? I'm not sure where to go next. I was planning to go to the library this a.m. but I can't (shouldn't?) keep putting time into this family because the proof is crucial.

In other words, thanks for reminding me to focus!

Dcleaning lady is here doing her magic. I need to take the ever patient ddog for her walk.

I am not going to Simchat Torah and dinner at temple - I usually love Simchat Torah and love parading the Torah but have a busy weekend - and I'm planning to go to temple in the a.m. for the family that has a bar mitzvah. Tomorrow night we are going to a bd dinner, and Sunday have a marathon planned - getting dd to the airport in ATL early, then going to an art glass artist about two hours from ATL, then the trip home, which is another 2 hours. So it's a busy weekend.
Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better [wo]man. Ben Franklin

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LadyMaverick
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby LadyMaverick » Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:54 am

Kathryn - Congratulations on the new addition to your family!

(((Cathys & DH)))) OUCH! I hope your DH heals with no problems.

There is so much I want to respond to but my mind is overloading

Focus - Yes I definitely need some focus here. Things have been happening so fast that I feel like I'm living in a time warp. One minute it is morning and the next minute it is evening. Whooosh! The time flies by faster than I am comfortable with. I would love to just have a one day down time with no obligations. That is just dream stuff for me.

Lots of family stuff going on that is taking my attention, time and energy.

Yesterday DMom was confused. About everything. I considered calling an emergency family meeting with my siblings but decided to hold off and see how DMom is doing today. It is a tough call when to make a change. DMom is going downhill mentally & physically. I don't want to overreact but also I want to leave DMom in a situation she can't handle. My siblings and I have been talking about having someone move in with DMom. If that doesn't happen then the second option is to move DMom in with us. DMom is fighting to maintain every element of her independence. We don't want to make a change until there is absolutely no other choice. It's a tough call when that moment is. We are just taking it day-by-day.

DGD7 got into a physical fight with a cousin yesterday at school. This was fight #2 these two have been in this school year. The really weird thing is normally they are great friends and get along great. There was also another student involved...a boy....that I think took things to a different level. All three got sent to the principal office and the event investigated. IMHO, DGD7 was the innocent one in this event but once she was on the ground with the boy on top of her, DGD7 did come up fighting and used her fist and feet. It's a tough call when you are physically attacked. Do you respond? If you do, then you are guilty too. The principal called all 3 children's parents explained what happened and gave them 2 options. All 3 of the parents choose the same punishment for their child. ANYway, there was drama overload.

Speaking of drama overload.....a young nephew came to DH yesterday and told him about something that his parents were doing that is negatively impacting him (the child). DH spoke to the parents about the situation and there were some strong emotions/opinions expressed by both sides. It all ended okay with the parents coming to our home later in the day and apologizing and saying they will make a change in their lives.

I spent some time on phone visiting with DSon, DGD7, and DGS11. They are doing very good. They have a crazy busy schedule and back-to-back activities all the time. But it works for them and they are thriving and enjoying life. On top of all they have going on, they have added moving to their activities happening in the next month. This move won't be a long distance (a few miles) but it involves buying and selling a home and all the stuff that goes along with that. The house they are buying is fairly new & well maintained but they want to make some changes before they move in so they are also adding renovation projects to this month. It makes my head spin with the amount & speed they do things, but it also makes my heart joyful that they are happy doing it together. Our firstborn child is now 44 years old. How did that happen? Whooosh! The time flies by. No matter how old he is, to me he is still my little baby boy that I love more than words can express.

I want to respond to the discussion about DS10 & attitude but I can't right now due to time constraints. I do want to say that I value your feedback VERY much and am reading and mulling over your input.
Last edited by LadyMaverick on Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Kathryn-in-Canada
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Kathryn-in-Canada » Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:44 am

LadyM: I know what you mean about head spinning when you think about all your ds is doing! I remember my dad telling me I was doing too much and to slow down. Now I try hard to bite my tongue when it comes to my own kids. So much of it is being older and looking for the more peaceful, level path through life. I no longer have the energy to power on through.

I finished breakfast and decided to tackle the kitchen before s2s but item one was returning the cordless phone to the bedroom. Then I made my bed,

then I started a laundry basket so I'd have clean clothes to choose from for the trip which meant..

pulling out my 2nd pair of jeans from the closet where I found my hiking pants and realized they are the best choice for the flight because of all the pockets.

I lay them out and started to lay out more clothes and got everything laid out (except what's to be washed)

then I pulled out my two carry-on bags (both soft, folding suitcases) and measured them. Theoretically they are the same size but the heavier one holds its shape better so feels larger so I put the things I have packed in it

discovered I have room for my pillow, even if I don't compress it (which I will.)

I pulled out my 'personal item' (for my computer) and discovered there's no compromise necessary, my computer backpack is sized to be a personal item so I can take it which gives me 2x the space I need but it is a backpack so will be better loaded while walking through airports (since my carry-on suitcase doesn't have wheels.)

But to confirm the right sizes, I find myself on my computer.

I'm still not s2s, the laundry isn't started (because my pjs are to be added to the load), and the kitchen hasn't been touched except the phone has been returned to the bedroom!

I'm going to pause for a moment while at the computer and email dh the picture of Iris. Because...why not take advantage of me being here?!?

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Nancy
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Nancy » Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:44 am

Top 3 is my focus....
S2s
Pay Bill via phone. X
Meal plan needed.
Get Needed items after store opens. X

Journal & planning done.
Got a few things on paper for a project planning time line / outline figured out yea!
Last edited by Nancy on Fri Oct 05, 2018 6:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Ramblinrose
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Ramblinrose » Fri Oct 05, 2018 10:54 am

Morning...

I’ve been around for a while but my stomach/esophagus has been keeping me in pain. I saw the esophagus specialist this week and need to have two test. One is called a Bravo capsule which will be placed down my esophagus. Its purpose is to measure the acid in my hernia area. I will be given a hand held control and use it when in pain. I will be asleep when they insert it. They will also do a colonoscopy at the same time.

The second test will insert a tube through my nose down to the bottom of my esophagus. Then I will need to swallow water. This will measure the pressure and muscle function of my esophagus. This is needed in case I can’t control my pain with meds and need surgery.

I had three dri appointments this week and at two of them both asked me professional advice abt the children when they learned or remembered I taught kids with behavior issues. Loved that I could help those who are helping me.

On the attitude with children issues I find what works with one child doesnt always work with another. My neurologist was having a terrible morning with her 12 yr old who was yelling and screaming at her for no apparent reason. My doc was perplexed saying her other two grown children never acted that way. It’s been my experience that most kids get an attitude because they are either angry or frustrated at something or some person and are unable to communicate their feelings... and sometimes they themselves can’t identify their frustrations. As a teacher it is my job to first try to calm them down and then help to identify the problem all while I stay calm no matter their behavior.

However first I have to gain their trust so they feel free to discuss why they are so unhappy without worrying about repercussions. Kids are very aware of the statement ... if y’all u tell the truth you won’t get into trouble... only to do so and then the adults does punish them for the act. To counter that I always tell my students you may or may not get in trouble, but no matter what I will stand with you and we will work through it.

The test comes when a kid does something stupid like throw a pencil or kick someone under the table and I know it. Usually I’ll say... did you throw that pencil knowing they will lie. Then I say... you need to trust me and ask the question against. Most of the time they come clean and Shan they admit what they did I put out my hand to shake theirs and say thank you for being honest and leave it at that.

However if I have a kid that’s being a pain with an attitude I usually take them out and do n the hall to talk to them. First question I ask is... did you have breakfast today? If the answer is no, they always know I have food for them in my room. But is they have eaten then I ask... did you have a fight with your_______ today? Mom, dad, girlfriend, boyfriend fill out n the blank. I find most kids just need to talk about this frustrations what ever they may be and that helps to diffuse the situation.

Today I am focusing on picking up footprints. I don’t feel well enough to clean so may have my “girls” in next week to do it for me.

LadyM... i feel for you as you have I had the same concerns about my near 91 year ago mom. There are no easy answers. My moms drivers license needs to be renewed and I suggested just getting a picture I’d.she flew off the handle and verbally attacked me for even suggesting it, even though she isn’t capable of driving any more. After she calmed down she explain she felt like everything been taken from her including her independent and her license was the only thing she had left.

I immediately renewed her license for her.
Last edited by Ramblinrose on Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
Live Boldly, Take Risks, No Regrets...Jilliam Michaels

Elizabeth
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby Elizabeth » Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:03 am

Good morning! Early morning for me - one of the foster cats woke me up at 530 and meowed until the 620 alarm! I did check food and water, but all he wanted was out of the bedroom. Like all prior cats, he must learn that, unless it is my mistake (food, water) or a crisis, I will not cater to anyone before the alarm. On the plus side, I was wide awake when the alarm went off and made carpool in record time. Another low tire alert, so I must deal with that Saturday. Today's WTF is DPCs: one to a credit card company to check whether I have a certain benefit and another to a belly dance class to make sure it is still going on tonight. DD16 did homework while I decluttered magazines. I finished one of the cat bed repairs after she left. She does not have Monday off, I do.

Three day weekend plans: costume shop, party prep/cleanup including finishing or putting away the LR sewing projects, tire repair or replace. This is an educational site, I looked up Simchat Torah.

Both congratulations and condolences to the In-Canada family. Definitely a time of mixed emotions.

LadyMaverick: One more attitude thing, then I must get off my soapbox or risk boring, annoying, and/or offending everyone. Imagine years from now, you have received a devastating diagnosis and want to talk and DS has been taught to say, "I don't want to hear any of that negative attitude!" My friends with cancer have heard comments like that, so do people with depression. I'm not sure if the ones saying it are idiots who truly believe that cancer can be cured by positive thinking or they are selfish people who expect everyone to modify themselves to suit them. Doesn't really matter, it hurts just the same.

RamblinRose: My then grandfather-in-law maintained his driver's license until he died in his 90s despite serious vision problems. No accidents, because he had quit driving years before. He just didn't want anyone to KNOW he couldn't drive anymore and we all pretended he still did.

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DeeClutter
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Re: Friday Focus

Postby DeeClutter » Fri Oct 05, 2018 11:37 am

All I can say, LadyM, is "WOW!" That is some house!
Begun is half done -SO! JUST BEGIN!!


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