US Memorial Day, PWYC

[Harriet]

Good morning on this day to honor those who passed away during their time of service in the armed forces. A lot to consider and to remember in many communities today.

And hopes that all who have a little vacation time with family have a safe, pleasant weekend.

We have a Question of the Day (eternal quest in life, perhaps, says lucylee?)

HOW does one accept and enjoy life, being flexible enough to accommodate family members and outside activities, while still setting and meeting goals of home-making, decluttering, organizing, etc.?
How does our system remain a HELP in our lives, and not just something that makes us feel we're falling short?

[Harriet]

That's a well-stated question. See all lucylee's concerns about the question in last evening post, pwyc.

I awakened with what seems to be the beginning of a few answers, so it must have been rattling around in my brain while I slept. (getting enough good sleep - that may be one part of my answer, along with other healthy habits to make sure your own "oxygen mask" is on before you try to help everyone else) I'll try to form some thoughts later today.

Harmony, if you're sleeping and not feeling cheated out of sleep, that's a win, IMO. If your body has decided that naps are part of its favored sleep-cycle, maybe your body knows best!

As far as visitations, I think by definition they almost have to be a mix of some structure - enough that a visitor could find the family - and general hubbub of conversation throughout the space. The concept, when you get right down to it, is that someone has invited to a visitation (or other name for a time to pay respects), and that "someone" can't very well be a building. It must be someone(s), who's somewhere in that building, and okay with greeting the people who've come at the time they chose.

About having no note or word of music at a funeral- if that's the decision because of a belief the deceased would have wanted it that way, of course that's to be respected. In this case, dd says if it was really what was wanted, someone should have told the minister to tone down his encouraging message, because it definitely lent itself to singing.

[CathyS]

Hi!

Beautiful day here! Just under 60 degrees here right now.

I have some laundry in the dryer to put on the wrinkle away cycle, so I can put it away. I try to not iron too much if I don't have to. Right now the ironing board is being pressed into service as a paper collector. I really should do something about it this week.

Supper tonight is chicken in some form. I think I will boil it for 5 minutes and then BBQ it.

My neighbor is an over-achiever. He cuts their grass on Friday morning and he is cutting it again right now. (There are 2 brothers that live in their late father's house. Neither one has a job. One is divorced and the other never married.)

[LadyMaverick]

My day is off to a smooth start. I am focusing on developing and stacking good habits. If I allow myself to think about whether I want to do this or that every time then I'll start the endless arguing in my brain. If I make the decision before and just do it then I find myself wondering why I thought it might be difficult.

Morning Habit stacking progress
** out of bed
** check on kids and make sure DH is available to watch them.
** PJ off, clothes on
** out the door to park. Walk/move enough to make breathing noisy & heart rate up. Keep it up until fitbit shows 30 minutes of non-stop moving.
** Home to do swimming pool daily chores.
** Kitchen opened for the day. Coffee made. Tea. made. Vitamins out.
** Breakfast & Coffee.

This takes about 1.5 hours. It makes me smile to remember how fast I used to be able to accomplish similar tasks but I'm okay with getting them done at this rate.

LucyLee - I crave order but it seems to be something that eludes me. Putting family before order definitely has consequences. I'm okay with that choice.

I have a pet peeve with funerals. People who don't come see the deceased when they are alive but then show up at the funeral. If you are going to send flowers then do it when they are alive. The whole industry surrounding funerals has developed into a huge production over the past century. It reminds me of religious ceremonies that have been made up. I know my feeling about funerals is not the norm in today's time.

[blessedw2]

a fine morning to you... hope you have a wonderful day
d lyn a fine evening to you ... hope you had a wonderful day

d harriet - thank you for starting us and hello
d cathy hello
d lady hello

hello all

[blessedw2]

I literally slept all day yesterday - still woke up with a bit of a headache but I do feel better
dd younger is sick and she heads back to Florida tomorrow - both dd's really enjoyed each other this weekend.

it's a new day. yay and a new week.

[blessedw2]

I think we are too hard on ourselves about what we think other people do to gain order. Even the most born organized people have rough days even if it looks effortless.

For me: I really have come to believe decluttering a large amount of the house is the only way to make the system easier. I have been working hard now for years and especially this last year March 2018 to May 2019. I cut out most zone work in the beginning - except the kitchen and only worked on decluttering (I hated it and my mind went into confusion mode- but it pays off).

I still have tons of - oh my gosh - I am so far behind. But cutting 2/3's of the stuff out of my house is making the routines easier. Right now we are at a standoff with dd youngers stuff. I am hoping to make some headway with that today with dd older.

I still have a long way to go - home repair from not doing things on the house for years. Also my garden is messing up my routines because there is so much to do.

I had d kat to talk to when I got stuck. I, if I could go back, would keep sweet kat and still hire an organizer (if I could afford it) to help me focus and have someone for 1 hour a week. one hour a week decluttering (and then put away, throw away, give away) is doable and important. It's hard but worth it. (sticking with one area a week) It's hard but once the stuff is gone you will be surprised. It's the biggest blessing I can give to anyone.

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

I put the outline of a butterfly on my weekly page spread and labeled it Rebirthing Week.

So I won't be here long. I'm doing a timed day and not a lot of time for you guys.

I have lots to say about funerals and some to say about the question of the day.

It is a normal day here.

I hope you all can enjoy your holiday. Especially I hope there will be no blowing away for LadyM.

Oh my, there's the timer. This online one is very annoying!

Poof!!!!

[Ramblinrose]

Morning y’all...

I’m not fond of funerals and don’t plan to have one when I die. Neither does Sweetie. I told my son if he wants to have a gathering once I’m dead I’m ok with that, but since I’ve lived so many places in my life, I’d wouldn’t expect many to show up anyway. I’m planning on being cremated and asked my son to put my ashes either in the pond or the river where I grew up. All my older relatives are buried in gravesites that are so far away that I never visit, including my dads.

We had a memorial service for my dad with a reception line, and then a simple quick service at the funeral home. The owner is a lifelong friend that grew up in the house behind mine and whom I used to baby sit.

After my dad’s service we had a celebration at a favorite restaurant for those who wanted to join us. We will do the same thing when my mom dies. I believe in talking about a persons wants and wishes before a person died. When visiting my son on my last visit, I gave him a written list of what I wanted along with Sweeties wishes should he out lives me. My son is also The executor of my trust and told me how much it meant to him to have my thoughts written down on paper.

I did five loads of laundry including sheets and pillows yesterday. My morning routines have already been done except for watering my sunnies. I will be meeting friends for lunch today at a new to me restaurant. Another front is coming through and today the high will only be 76*, 20* below normal, but I’ll take it... with the exception of Nancy, the rest of you will get this system in the next few days.

LadyM...I like your “just do it” attitude, cause like you I can out think myself as well.

To answer Lucylee’s question, I mirror Harmonys thoughts. In my younger years after following my box, I was very strick with my home routines, but I had family and lots of people coming in and out of my home. Now my life is much simpler and as long as I do like Harmony and keep up with my daily routines I’m fine with that.

Off for my second cup of coffee and Perry. Enjoy your day.

[LadyMaverick]

I'm in waiting mode. I need to make a trip to the city to buy supplies and also take kids to see DMIL in the hospital.

DD came and got DGD7 at 10pm last night. DD just called and is bringing DGD7 back now.

I'm sitting here listening to DS10 and DGS11 talk online. Playing a game together requires them to coordinate and work together. I have a love/hate feelings toward online games. My favorite thing about the online games is this.....two young cousins who live hours away from each other are talking and planning together to accomplish a common goal. They would never develop this close of a relationship if they only saw each other for a few hours a few times a year.

DH is at the hospital with his DMom. He will probably be there most of the day. Yesterday they discussed and confirmed her DNR wishes. She is 88 years old and weighs about 90lbs. She doesn't have a lot of physical strength to get her through this. I admire DMIL greatly and wish there was something I could do to help her. Our relationship couldn't be any better. She reaches out for my hand, squeezes it then says "I know. I know". Her private room at the hospital stays full with family. There is only space for about 5 people in the room so the family has to rotate out when someone new comes to visit her.