September's Dynamic Declutter

[Harriet]

I may watch the back-to-back Hoarders premiere on A and E tonight, which lasts from 9 to 11 EST. That leads right up to my bedtime, though, and it's a school night with several extra things to do. We'll see. Maybe just one instead. Interested to see the direction they go. I've heard that the competition, "Hoarders: Buried Alive" on TLC, has definitely listened to the surveys and started emphasizing the positive, as far as showing change and the good that's done, rather than shock value. Without a definable before-and-after difference, they are producing a medical program, not helping people on either side of the camera.

Remember with these almost-sentimental things, if you are really stuck and about to continue holding something that generates guilt either way, a photo can capture it, let you remember the fun but have "permission" to let go. But it's hard, for sure. One sad thing is when you keep something only to find it deteriorated waiting on you. Anyway, "do as I say, not as I do", for I have many decisions waiting.

I've whittled the clutter problem in dd12's room and closet down to 6 small contained areas for her to tackle one at a time. Visually, the clutter is gone: these are underbed or other containers. Oh, and also there is one drawer of her desk that is so crammed it won't open - so we're not home free yet! That may take some brain power.

[blessedw2]

dharriet, you are a woman of wisdom. I admire who you are.

[Harriet]

blessed, when I read in Cardfile Central all you get done in a day, I have no illusions about my smarts! I am following along behind you wisely trying to keep up.

Well, I didn't watch the whole Hoarders 2-hour but I did pay attention between bursts of Evening Daily Card. Glanced at the site yesterday, too, where 4 of the professionals (organizers and doctors) were taking questions. Lots of people posted that after they watched they immediately started some decluttering and one lady said she took several bags worth of clothes out of a closet for donation. Others said they were starting their whole-house declutters now and got lots of pats on the back.

Organizer Joan Shay said: "The pros and cons about the show - it does show some of the more disagreeable sights that can come into people's lives. However, what we don't know (and may never know) is how many people were helped by the airing of this show "

There was one part that got ugly with daughters just furiously yelling at their mother, and the organizer took criticism for allowing that to continue.

Organizer Matt ____ was very optimistic that he felt anyone could declutter their homes and that he would start with any empty boxes to find the most new space for them fast.

He also said, "Personally, I do not believe in putting stuff in boxes and leaving it for sorting later. If we get one room or the entire house, I don't care, but we are cleaning it room by room until we run out of time."

Interesting.
He said the first 2 days he gives are all planning (and encouraging the family), they give 80 hours thereafter, and whittle down to 21 minutes for the show.

Oh, btw, Matt ____ warned that one part next week is going to be tough to watch because when they got into the home they discovered so much more true filth and need for cleaning than they expected and weren't ready for it. Usually they deal with clutter but sometimes find this. Of course, I myself am actually wishing for a show that would deal more with how-to cleaning, so I got all interested and hopeful, but from what he said this is not the kind of situation I'm looking for.

[Nancy]

I get "creeped out" by these shows and had to quit watching them.
It is a motivator when I de-clutter don't want my place to get that bad
when I feel upset by getting rid of something it's good to think of the useable space that
I'll re-claim.

Example:
This summer gave dson the sterio back that he had loaned us when he moved did not have room for it; it was one of his friends too. We had not used it in a year.
Now it's so much easier to clean and dust the place it was before and
they are using it so that's a good thing!
So I'm very happy about that now.

Books are a challenge; as are notebooks and binders so
I've been trying to stay on top of that and go through the book cases
at least once a season now.
Hubby found a binder he could use and needed
so one more spot is opened up in there now too!

This thread is helpful in identifying areas that are challenges for me.

[blessedw2]

I had a hard time with the daughters yelling at their mom because they did not realize this woman could not see the hoarding and was suffering from mental illness of the "stuff". I saw that a lot with eating disordered woman and teens. The family feels that the person is being selfish many times and can't see that by yelling only makes the person either dig their heels in more or just have one more thing to verify they are worthless and not worth saving. sometimes I believe that the memories of who they lost, safety feeling of things around them, being used to the view, or a lost childhood can be a reason for extreme hoarding in some instances. Families are angry at what the illness is taking away and can't understand the pain involved that got the person where they are or the illness that is underneath they can't seem to understand or control.

I am finding for me, I have overplanned all the things I wanted to do in my life thinking I was just lazy. Sometimes I was but not all the time. Having too many things around me to "one day do" especially with dkids and other children, caused me to attach myself to too many dreams instead of acting on what I could do in reality.

My trouble spot is papers/pictures/and what ifs. I like the idea of a picture. I have so so many papers and wish papers.

[blessedw2]

dharriet... I do think you are smart, wise, and have a gentle kind open spirit! and someone who has a gift for the written word.

emptied out desk, put desk outside for anyone who wants it, it not garbage comes this saturday instead of friday so I will help the garbage man with the desk or break it apart

[Harriet]

Progress decluttering master bedroom:
1 box broken down and recycled
1 box repurposed
3 clothes items to donation bag
small chest rethought - 2 drawers finished
lots put away
and that was just yesterday - have been working for days!

Trying to decide:
how many/much bags like large holiday gift bags and paper grocery bags to keep?
Should I fold up but keep small appliance-type boxes?

I'm way off my before-Focus schedule still - should be in bathroom at least but master bedroom is always the biggest job. Today will be in kitchen anyway, because washer has been dragged out, etc.

[Nancy]

dd & I were talking about how Seasonal Clothing has caused a jam up in bedrooms in our homes because it's not quite time to store all the summer stuff yet and we had to get out warmer long sleeved things as the cooler days have begun. So my solution was to get a few things out of here that no longer fit, put away part of the summer stuff and that helped. More to do how ever. With a couple of days in the ninety's had to keep out some cooler stuff.

[Harmony]

I watched those shows the other night. There were 2 hours, 4 different people/families. 2 I had definite problems with, the Hawaiian family with children in serious distress, and one family with adult children who were in denial and the man mad as all get-out that someone would dare tell him what to do.

While I was watching one show I got all grossed out and had to go clean out my refrigerator and wash shelves/drawers. Got to thinking about when I began saving little ketchup packages into a larger plastic bag...and yep, that was maybe 5 or 6 years ago, and they have no expiration dates on them. So tossed them right out. A little thing, but the clean shelves and that stuff gone had me feeling very happy.

On another subject, I do use a bulletin board but strictly for appointments which I put on the calendar and then tack up the appointment card. Also things like the library notice of books due, stuff like that. After each thing is done I take down the notice or card and throw it away. Keeps me organized and clutter at a minimum.

[blessedw2]

wonderful the board works for you! dharmony
Cheers for dharriet, dnancy, dsherinjoy, dharmony

sherinjoy, I like your idea of donating to your local school. I hold the colored pencils/scissors/etc. in my hands and know that our local donation place won't take school supplies unless unopened... I do have a few of those. great idea.

re: hoarders - I do like it and am a regular watcher to just remember why I continue to fight the tendency to keep things that I place sentimental value to. It helps me remember what I really want to leave my kids as keepsakes. my great great grandfather gave each child a napoleon plate (part of history) and remember people didn't keep things like we do now, my great grandfather passed those down and my dmom has his large bed hand carved wood cross and my great grandmothers iron candle and one iron (for the fire type), she has my grandmothers cross stitch she made at 12 and a picture my grandfather made of a girl praying and 2 paintings he made. so over all those generations: about 7 little things not a whole house. The one thing they did do is tell stories that we have kept. So I look at these shows and realize that ALL the things are just things and not the people I have had in my lives. It gives me purpose to make sure I don't burden my dkids and not to attribute memories to things rather than live their lives.