12/26/12 getting ready for new years.

[Harriet]

lucylee, 2 things. I "shoulda".. ...

First, I actually thought, after turning my computer off last evening, that I should have said to you that I will COME CLOSEST to sticking with the Focus here rather than any other plans. It is the one I ruin least often. Even here, with friends who would encourage, I still slip off the wagon. And it's time to admit that when Indiana got so sick and wasn't here starting threads, I think everyone slowed in posting. Eventually, bittersweet and I stopped putting up threads, even. I don't know if it was a mental block or related to Indiana's failing health and our loss, but there's a new year before us now. Thankful to blessed for being so welcoming through threads lately.

And second, I hope you didn't think I was saying I thought only Focus should be discussed here. I think everything related to cleaning goes in this forum, including switching over to different rooms and plans when it works best. I shoulda said that friends here are looking at the Focus calendar and probably chatting about Focus rooms, and I need collective wisdom to keep me on track!

How I would describe the Focus plan in general, as related to other plans... ...

Indiana showed (with authority!) that a house thrived if there was full cleaning attention to each of its areas just 4 times a year. So with Focus, our houses can be broken down into smaller areas to clean per week, and successful weeks are more likely. Housecleaning is put on maintenance during end-of-year holiday times, so there is built-in time for seasonal plans to take its place, without guilt.

[blessedw2]

I don't see why we can't use other focus - it's the same thing and if it helps those who follow say flylady then it may be used more. I just need a focus in one area that revolves but I can do that on my own. I find having a focus of any kind helps me well FOCUS LOL otherwise I tend to be all over the place and get nothing done.

as for me you never ever have to worry - I am happy with what ever you decide to do. you are so sweet d harriet.

[lucylee]

I understand exactly what you're saying, Harriet, and also agree w/blessed --

having a focus of any kind helps me well FOCUS LOL otherwise I tend to be all over the place and get nothing done.

Sooo sooo true.

Indiana was right, I know... 4 times/year per room/area would be such a HUGE improvement around here.
And I just need to FOCUS on SOMETHING.
And, for the next 20 weeks, I am going to try be easy on myself and just start trying to move in the right direction. Then -- retirement -- and maybe I can find a routine.
But who knows? LIFE always gets in the way, doesn't it? Eldercare w/dfil is not an issue anymore... then ddad starts facing possible stem cell transplant 12 hours away...
I know there is not one person on this board who doesn't have constant concerns and interruptions while trying to "focus." I guess we all just learn to work around the day and do the best we can.

AND... this is a real problem w/me, also, and maybe needs a thread all to itself. HOW TO WORK AROUND DH? At a certain point, everything is "good enough" for dh. He is so obsessive about so many things... but I think I could go six months w/out vacuuming or cleaning the baths and he wouldn't care. And then when I do get started w/something, seems like that is always the time that he wants to do something else.
Now how do you handle a situation like that???
I know this may really become a problem when I retire and we are both home together 24/7 for the most part.

[blessedw2]

my dh is exactly the same way d lucy!!! you have no idea. when I started doing work again in the house (school took much of my decluttering out of the way) and dh was doing many of the dailies. I could have a filthy floor and he wouldn't care; but once I started working again he became annoyed. If I hadn't done anything he would have been okay and he is obsessive about certain areas. I finally figured out that he felt he had to do the work too and it agitated him. He felt guilty that I was working and he doesn't like change period (he is a keeper but a neat keeper)but couldn't see how he felt. I had to tune out much of his obstinance and reassure him I wanted to do things but I didn't expect him to be involved. We now tell each other our goals in the morning and sometimes they match lol. I found though if I get involved he does too . I wanted the kitchen painted a long time.. he was not too happy but I started anyway.. you know that guy eventually did work in there because he wanted to because most of it was getting done. It is the nature of some men and women. I have learned to tune out certain things unless he gets overly negative, which is easy when he is sick and is part of his natural tendencies.he definitely puts up with my oddities Then I come here and let it all out!!!

Right now Flylady is in the Front room, for your focus can you dust 1/4 of the room, get rid of magazines in 1/4 of the room. I use pinterest for my magazine of rooms now or scan a page and store it so I don't have all those papers any more. even if you dejunk a 2 x 2 space - it is dejunking!!! and it won't overwhelm you. I used to look at the big picture when it came to focus area... I thought I had to do everything on that list... how much pressure can one person put on themselves. Now I know better - and their are times I can't even touch a room.

Clutter: my biggest clutter controller - the dejunking thread for help tossing and support. I also go in a drawer for that area and if I see it getting carried away well I hit it. I may only do 15 minutes of put away in that drawer but it helps.

[BookSaver]

Blessedw2 ~ Thank you for starting the conversation about planning for the new year.

Harriet ~ Thanks for reviving the focus calendar. I like the way you put it --

It is the one I ruin least often.

You have a good way of splitting the work when you advise us all to spend a bit of time the preceding week to declutter the focus area, to get that "but first" step out of the way before the week of deep cleaning.

[blessedw2]

Christmas stuff is ready to go into the basement.(all sitting in the kitchen). tossed some things that have gotten worn after many faithful years.

[Nancy]

Pretending we are having company for New Years so I'll mop kit. and dining room tonight!

Did not get dip found out it's got the im. crab made w/ potato starch deli chicken is yummy got some ahead!

[blessedw2]

great thinking and great work d nancy

[Harriet]

What do you all think of having a copy of Indiana's "Getting Started" single post as it appears from 2008 as the first thread of this forum for a permanent, locked "sticky" thread? That way, everyone from old hands to newbies would have access to the best explanation of Focus, right at the top. I'll sound out the "hows" with other mods and admins - I think it can be done.

BookSaver, those are kind words. Perhaps we could try abbreviating the "week before" in Decluttered Home threads again this year. Seeing them in a quick scan might be helpful or inspiring. I think the positive goal should always be trying to get as many small successes under our belts as we can, to keep up our momentum and confidence. We've got to avoid burn-out (doing too much) and discouragement (too much to do). Focus already simplifies each week into just one room or smallish area. So if, in the week before, the clutter there has come under at least SOME attack, a success for that week becomes more possible. That success offers encouragement for the next room, etc.

We also have to be able to "skip" parts or even the whole of a Focus cleaning when necessary. Indiana always said everything wouldn't get done each round, and that was okay. We still had our dailies and weeklies going, and the room's turn would come around again. I think it's ideal to think that way, especially for those times like lucylee is having now, when she needs to be easy on herself and flexible.

For me, a key seems to be "getting it down on paper" or other similar record keeping, so I know what I plan to do. Without SOME form of a visual reminder, saying to me, "You were going to dust that ceiling fan today", or whatever, I will waste/lose time spinning my wheels.

[Nancy]

Kitchen swept and mopped
Dining room traffic areas done too
it sure looks better now! Yea !