blessed, I will take some of that cheering, too! I am taking a break at the moment before heading back to firm up my arms!
Sorry about the keyboard!
My mother's twin was critical of me and my cousins, always holding us to such a high standard, but then about the time she turned 80 she changed outlook and started saying rather forgiving, inclusive things to us instead for the last decade of her life. I don't think any of us ever "took it to heart" anyway. She said it in nagging ways, but not rough.
I would say if there is a direction of family which I have found most critical and competitive through my adult life, you probably already know it is dfirstils, especially dfirstsisteril. Still - even after all these years - I think about the events at which I will next see them and plan how I need to look/act/speak my best, rather than just looking forward to getting together. Isn't that unfortunate? I try to catch myself and GET OVER IT, but there it is. Dbil and his wife are also a little bit that way, but somehow don't bother me. Interestingly, it is dbil's wife who is always slim and trim in cute clothing, yet I don't feel concern about how she will react to me, but how dfirstsisteril will react.