2025!!!!! Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall, winter again.

[Twins' Mom]

You do have a busy day, bw2. Is dh showing improvement?

[blessedw2]

yes he is definitely improving - they had a heart dr. look as him as he had a a fib incident when he went in - they believe it was because of his lack of oxygen - he was 72 - he is happy and isnt' anxious to leave which is unusual.

now that dh's brain is back - we still think he is a bit autistic - we always have - dd older and I are going to have an intervention meeting with him before he comes home. We are not going to hit him with everything that needs to change but basics.

His hygiene, his lack of taking care of himself on all levels including trac care,
that he has to allow me to clean his room and bathroom.
dental care and feet care - hiding is not helping.
dd doesn't think I should not be reminding him about his care bc. he is only 69 and should be able to get take care basic needs. He also needs to go to the dr. earlier enough before we reach this level over and over again.
He wasn't at deaths door - he did not have to go to the icu this time. but was really really sick.

dd's rule is that he can no longer wait for her to take him on the weekend.

I hope you have a wonderful day d twins.

I will say my brother told my mom that I could take her to her apartment today so she could look at it. I told him I was busy today but I could take her tomorrow. I do wish he or others wouldn't offer that I can just do it without asking.

[blessedw2]

Time for some introspection:

I am noticing that I am not feeling as patient with some mom things. I am kind but I have to regroup a bit. look at the why of the impatience and how to work with it to make it better. I have been nice but I can feel impatience coming in.

dh - I am thinking too far ahead of what could be when he comes home. Will he go back to his habits that got him sick and dirty in the first place. I am really worried that he won't be flexible to taking care of himself.

I have to figure out how not to be a "poor me" person when others say I need to do this or that. I have to be stronger and just say no - sorry - I can't - I have no time for me to be whiny or falling into the trap of doing things and overwhelming myself. Say no or come up with a solution but be kind.

I need me and dog time.

-----------------------------------------------
I might just list things for check off:

up at 6.00 am - mom woke me to tell me dogs needed to go out - she has figured out how to open most of the back door - I worry that she might forget the dogs.,are outside, if it's cold.
fed the dogs
ate breakfast
looked at calendar
cold today - it was supposed to be warmer
dishwasher on
sink cleaned
counters cleaned
fixed card file
table clean

make dinner

remember to write nursery about cornus white dogwood
write the township about the tree in front
write the landscape architect about the front

dh visit - he may come home tomorrow I am worried but I have to put that off to the side.
thank God for the day.

8:00 am. start timer.
pull cards
9:21 am check in
11:24 am
made the banana bread, simple syrup, rhubarb stuff for oatmeal
I will put the butter together for the chicken Kiev
I will also coat the chicken after and then put in fridge for later.
I will need to prep the chicken but everything else is done - carrots cut and peas defrosting - I made rice the other day

cut mom's finger nails and now she is finishing them. she won't let me do a pedicure on her.


mom was nice and then not nice
she is trying to feed the dogs

12:46 pm
be positive
turned on dw again from mostly making dinner
washed the counters again and stove
eating cut up cucumber and celery
'1:20 pm
2:23 pm
refilled the humidifier for mom and moved it.
flip flop laundry and put away
I am tired - more drained.
4:47 pm fed dogs
grabbed garbage from upstairs and tossed it in the garbage cans out front.
7:31 pm I didnnt' get to see dh again - dd just got home - mom - is struggling a bit - she said that it's hard bc sometimes she doesn't know what home she is at/state. she said it is part of her age - she saw she was forgetful.
dinner was made - I liked it. - but I made it
mom didn't eat more than the veggies. she tossed the left over lasagna of hers right away. I had the chicken bc I figured she wouldn't eat it.

mom did not know what to do re: her nose running. she should have Kleenex in the family room but it's gone again - she finally used the pillow case in front of her bc I could see I wasn't going to get to her in time.

I had to physically take her dirty socks off bc she wouldn't - it was a kind but decisive moment. she now has new socks on. she is now reading her French Pecos bill like she had never seen it. it makes her happy every time she comes across it.

she is stuck on the idea of getting a blood test which is tomorrow but thinking it's today.

She just asked me where her mother was. I feel for her. I didn't say anything except that she had a wonderful mom and dad - she then said she also had wonderful grandparents.

Next cards:
take recycling out
take garbage out
fill bird feeders
went through mail.
I am so tired! I had planned on seeing dh but mom can not be left.
last of mom's laundry is done
I am glad I found the dryer lint. collector that mom put in a bag with lint she took out.
I need a shower but I am tired.

I must exercise I can't miss this any more
mom needs pt I can't miss it.
I also missed her eye drops

[lucylee]

(((Blessed))) I just have to say, I think you are totally AMAZING in how well you manage all the caregiving that is on your plate right now. I just do not think I could perform half as well as you do. Please be kind to yourself and allow yourself to be human. A little impatience is definitely allowed.

[blessedw2]

you are truly a good good person d lady - Your teaching has always amazed me - there is only a rare few who can truly be great educators; your students were very lucky to have you!!! you are also a wonderful grandmother - you live a busy busy life - you have my admiration!!!
thank you!

[blessedw2]

my ADHD is in the way today!
I did see dh with dd older
spoke to dd younger

mom was very good today! She did not want to get dressed in new cloths - it's 1:50 pm and she finally went to the bathroom to get dressed. I am wondering she will change from top to bottom Nope she game out with the cloths she fell asleep in bc she wouldn't change into her pjs.
at least she went to the bathroom.

the dishwasher is on
the sink is cleaned
I ordered groceries
I will make stuffed cabbage, I have left over carrots, I will make potatoes, cucumber salad
the washing machine is on
ordered groceries
pulled the garbage and recycling cans in.
checked winter sowing

Next:
check seedlings and water if needed

put cards on table -

GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER:

mom keeps trying to feed the dogs
she changed her cloths but didn't change her underwear -
she is not about to. just be happy she is changed.
she brushed her teeth - yay !!!
now to brush her hair

lol she can notice the other things that need washing and that they are all mine
flip flopped moms blankets
emptied dw
moved rain barrel outside
took out more garbage
put car in garage
put new fan together to harden off plants


next: exercise for me - lets see what I can do with d mom's pt.

7 weeks to last frost -

[blessedw2]

"Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day" — Dalai Lama

"The only impossible journey is the one you never begin"

"Believe in yourself. If you can dream it, you can do it" — Walt Disney, 1

"Do the best you can. No one can do more than that" — John Wooden

"When you give joy to other people, you get more joy in return" — Eleanor Roosevelt

March 8, 2024
Saturday

trying hard to add positive and grateful thoughts during the day to help my overall attitude. I am normally a naturally happy person but I have found that I am not naturally joyful at this time. I can feel a pressure over me. I am experimenting with the idea of finding one thing to be positive or grateful for every hour. (also no matter how cold it is - go outside).

woke with a headache and I think my sleep apnea is back - I have't needed a c pap for a long time.
I locked the dogs outside of the kitchen bc they went crazy over the squirrels outside our kitchen window. I enjoyed every minute!

I am ready to start the day -
dh texted me about oxygen coming to the house.
mom has been awake and then asleep all am (I have been up since 6:30 but I wanted a quiet morning - glad I talked her into sleeping.

timer check in 9:30 am

[blessedw2]

march 9, 2025 a new time as well.

we are not going to visit dh today - I feel bad about it but I need to do his sheets etc.

mom is rinsing the dishes for the dw yay
dh is not home yet
I wonder what it's going to be like when he is home. worrying will do nothing. action will.
watered the birds outside - put food out for the birds -
let the dogs in the outside yard
cleaned the counters and the kitchen table - pt away.
changed the dogs water
gave mom breakfast and meds
me breakfast early and meds
Thank God for the day - a toast with my coffee.
did my readings for lent


what I want to do or have to do:
fittness
dogs play

moved light thing for seeds and swept behind
moved kitchen table and cleaned underneath
sweep vacuum and rinse all floors - kitchen done (everything is taking me longer - I know mom is helping but she doesn't always stick to the area she is helping on and then questions what to do with this and that. her heart is willing!~ my ADHD is the problem - I feel lucky to stick to one thing at a time lol
lunch for me done
switch geraniums into larger container

2:30 pm next rinse the finger prints from the walls on bottom. done
finished the 2 other counters
mom did the stove beautifully
add to future work - wash the chairs in the kitchen well.
2:50 next
vacuum and sweep the dining room and front hall - rinse it washed bottom walls
front hall vacuumed and rinsed
mom wiped the front window on the bottom
sweep the laundry room floor
do Monday work today

next: clean the laundry room (it's normally a Monday job) 3:38 pm
4:28 pm (feed dogs in an hour)
clean the outsides of the washer and dryer
next clean sink laundry room
cleaned door and finger prints
dust the walls
vacuumed 1/2 the room and rinse surface

5:33 fed dogs

what I should do:
shower
study

7:06 I need to do a put away in the kitchen



positive: it is beautiful outside

[blessedw2]

add a habit earlier in the day - put away in the kitchen by 5/6. I get tired in the evening and then put off this job to the next day.

have a headache but took tylonel
mom is back to sleep and I have to wake her up
I have to see dh
say my prayers to be strong and have be okay that I have to be - no victim stuff.

it sounds terrible but I have been happy to have a break from Dh - the worry was a weight and it has been good to have this time to know he can't say no to the drs. and he is safe.

up late 8 am
dogs fed
breakfast
pulled cards
meds for me
spoke to dd and texted dh
took bedding of dh's bed.
showered

10:40 am
made filling for the dinner needs to sit for a bit
made a batch of banana bread dough - cooking later
I should cut up veggies for eating but I want to do other things.
mom has been fed
she is moving sloooooowwwww - kind of I don't know what I want to do moving
she wants to lie down a few seconds.

struggle from the past that I have to let go of: a mom habit - she picks up a picture of dd's (4 and 10 years old) it's always how beautiful dd younger is in that picture - I always mention that they both look cute. She then says oh yes dd older looks nice too. When they were young she would say these types of things in front of them and it would hurt one or the other - whomever she focused the positive on. for her beauty etc is important - she noticed every blemish but at least now she tries to be kind not fact in her mind. Let it go bc she doesn't know any better. I can gently guide her without making her feel bad.

11:56 am I can easily get stuck bc mom is happily dilly dallying (not dressed etc). and it is best not to go down to her speed; which I could easily do!
But I do have energy.
next flip flop dh's blankets
wash the kitchen towels etc.
empty dw
fill dw even not completely full - turn on I made the things for dinner and want these dishes clean
emptied sink

1:08
washed mom's hair - she is up again. I have cloths out for her -
wrote a big sign for her to know where I am
played with the dogs
waiting for the Invisable fence people

1:48 pm going outside again

4:43 pm I loved working on outside - emptied the just frozen pots from last year - some are still frozen solid.
I spoke to my next door neighbor for an hour - he is doing well after having a very rough year.
I hadn't planned on talking that long but it was a nice conversation.

leave jobs for mom: sink
right side of fridge she needs to have me near by working.
she did get dressed on her own - so nice even though it was at 4:00 that she finally got dressed.
it's a tired day for her.

what I need to do but down want to
boil up the outside cabbage leaves and wrap them around the meat.
I don't want to!!! I am not hungry

what I should do: declutter car
finish dh's bed
vacuum his bedroom
rinse his toilet area again

[blessedw2]

March 11, 2025
timer work and ta da's today

got my bloodwork done
dogs fed
mom fed

okay: cards are pulled but need to be laid out
say thank you to God for a new day

it's been a busy day -