SHEs Organized

Oh yes... I have such wonderful systems... excellent systems... and then I seem to just look at my system/plan and think about it...
and then go sit in the recliner and fall asleep.
WHY is that? WHY is it sooo incredibly difficult to just make oneself get up and get going? Even for five minutes???
I KNOW if I do just five minutes I'll be off to a good start... but I just sit there and play on my phone.
* I REALLY need to make the phone a REWARD for the five minutes, don't I?

Right now, however, I am exhausted, and I believe it is because of several factors --
1. being "on" the past 24 hours or so for dgd, who was a restless sleeper herself
2. being unable to sleep well last night -- because of my own crazy brain
3. being unable to sleep well the previous two nights -- because dh was in such pain. (Arthritis pain had moved to shoulder.)

HOWEVER -- dh is MUCH better. After much prayer and taking the very last Norco pill in the house, dh woke up yesterday morning at 7:00 a.m. and said, "Call and see if you can get me an appointment with the doctor today, and if he can't see me, ask if he can at least refill the Norco, because Tramadol is not doing a thing for this."
So -- answered prayers -- he saw the doctor before lunch, got a steroid shot, a week's worth of prednisone, and new rx's for both pain pills. Doctor said when pain was bearable, take the Tramadol, but he agreed it was good to keep a stronger medicine on hand for the times when dh just can't stand it any longer.
The shot took effect almost immediately and dh has felt much better ever since. He is always so reluctant to go to the doctor because "he always ends up finding something else wrong with me that isn't even related to why I went to him in the first place!" This time, he is very relieved that the doctor focused on the situation at hand and offered steroids so quickly. And dh slept great last night.

I have trouble sleeping a lot, because at night, when the house is dark and quiet... that's when my mind wanders back to days gone by and why I did or didn't do... whatever... conversations I wish I could have had... and I replay these scenarios endlessly in my head.
My dfriend passed away a year ago next week, the 30th.
I miss talking to her so much, but I know it probably wasn't healthy to indulge in endless conversations with her about the past.
I've come to look upon that last week or so with her as just a wonderful gift God granted me -- it was too much of a "God thing" that she ended up in the hospital at the same time as dmom, that I had been in touch with her so I was able to find out that she was there. Some would say it was just a coincidence, but I can't accept that. We had not been face-to-face in almost 21 years... and then... there she is, and I am the ONLY person who is able (or willing, since her daughter broke contact) to visit her???
Maybe I asked questions that I shouldn't have, maybe I didn't really need to know the answers, but if God didn't want me to know at least a little more, and if she didn't feel a need to share a little more information, how could our circumstances have possibly ended up with us together like that?

So now, I guess I'm still struggling with what to DO with this gift I was given! LOL... maybe it's like a monstrosity of an artwork that makes you a little upset to look at, but the person who gave it to you means so much to you that you can't just hide it away in a closet. So I have to find some good in it, some way to use this information to improve myself today, some way to accept it even though it doesn't match anything in the decor of my life today, right?

I can't remember the last time I cried about this -- I'm good -- it's just that endless stream of thinking about the road not taken. I guess that is a common problem for a lot of people; Robert Frost's poem would never have been so popular otherwise.
As I've told y'all before, my mind IS a waste of terrible thing.

EDITING TO ADD --
While glued to this chair at the computer, I have accomplished a couple things --
* contacted Shutterfly to check on order which never arrived -- they are sending a re-order at no charge to me
* APPLIED FOR SOCIAL SECURITY * whew *
* did some "homework"/research into church situation -- made some notes in prep for next council meeting
* checked with Amazon -- not going to return the usb adapters, they cost less than $8 and unless I go to the UPS store in Next Town, my refund will be less than $2!!! They have already refunded shipping costs, because it was late arriving. I'm beginning to get used to this keyboard with what Kathryn so appropriately called "Chicklet" keys.

The quiet and calm of being alone in the house lasted less than 30 minutes. I went to the next town with DH to get a couple of parts. While he was looking for the parts, I wanted to look for a digging fork. In the past years I have been using a pitchfork to turn my compost, but the pitchfork has disappeared. I have asked everyone, and no one knows what happened to the pitchfork. I expect it will show back up someday, but in the meantime, I now have a digging fork which is a better tool for the job of turning the compost.

DDs14 reminded me that we didn't celebrate him graduating from 9th grade. He is officially a high schooler now. His friends in public school wore gowns and walked across the stage to celebrate this moment. DS14 didn't want to have any part of wearing a gown but he does want to go out to eat. So, for the 2nd time today I am going to eat at a sit-down restaurant. I expect the scales will show that I gained 5lbs today.

That's good of you celebrating ds's graduation, too, LadyM! Have fun!

Y'all -- I DID IT!
I FORCED MYSELF TO STAY AWAY FROM THE RECLINER when I got up from this computer, and now, I can add even more ta-das!
* Dried dh's shower
* Put away dgd's bath toys
* Refilled humidifier (we run it at night in the bedroom; dh thinks it helps him breathe better.)
* Picked up, put away the pallet dgd slept on last night
* Straightened covers on our bed
* Washed a sink full of dishes
* Picked up toys in dgrands' bedroom
* Refilled cokes and water in refrigerator

In another inning and a half (LOL -- that's how a baseball fan [dh] tells time) we are going out for supper and ds is going with us.
But for now, I will sit and REWARD myself with the phone and the newspaper!

We're about a half hour away from home. We had a wonderful visit with our friends and a lot of fun. We just talked and talked and did some walking last night and then today we went to a large neighborhood garage sale and I bought five pairs of earrings and two little toys and spent a total of $5.

Then in the afternoon I spent much much more than that on a whole pile of new clothes because DD's Godmother knew of good places to take me to look for clothes.

So now I really have to do the Kon Mari of my current wardrobe and ditch the things that no longer spark joy and figure out what more I need to fully incorporate these new things into my wardrobe.