(((
Harriet))) -- hugs for your difficulties w/ddad... and for all related frustration w/the photos...
and for being so reassuring to me this morning!
Harmony -- I was just complaining, sort of, about my weight. Again. That was what I thought everyone would be disappointed in me about. I've done nothing but gain, overall, since y'all first "met" me. I'm glad we've lost our previous boards and you can't go back and archive to see just how much I've gained. * sheesh * Some of you probably do have archives from the very beginning... but anyway. Right now, I'm not even obsessing about my weight anymore. Just trying not to get any BIGGER.
* sigh *
Tonight I am obsessing b/c I'm afraid I hurt ddil's feelings!!!
We were eating supper together, and ds asked if we wanted to go with him to this music thing next Thursday, about three hours away, and I really want to go, and dh wants to go... but it will be at least midnight when we get home. Probably later.
Ddil is supposed to work -- 12 hour shifts -- T/W/Th, I think, next week... and she said to ds, "Do you want me to take off Thurs & work Fri?"
And before anyone else could say anything, my big mouth says, "Would you be able to work Fri if you go? It will be a pretty late night."
* sigh * What business is it of mine???
Ddil said, "I could. I wouldn't be driving. I could sleep on the way home..."
And ds joined in w/me... saying they were going back to the same thing on Saturday, and she would probably end up feeling terrible Fri at work AND Sat at the festival, if she went Thurs, too.
So then ddil said okay, she'd work Thurs, no problem...
And when I tried to apologize before we dropped them off at home, she said it was okay, I had not discouraged her from going and I had not said anything I shouldn't... that she just thought if it was a family outing, she would go and be part of the family...
(So yeah... that made me feel worse...)
So I still felt bad about it when I got home & I even called her on the phone and told her I certainly didn't know WHY I thought she couldn't work on Friday after a night of gallivanting around --
I was planning to do it, and while I wasn't pregnant, I was certainly a lot older than her, so if I could do it, she could do it... that we'd probably be home by midnight... and I was just worried to death thinking I had made her think I didn't want her to go for some reason! I also told her I loved her and I had just been telling someone today that I really felt like I had not lost a son, I had gained a daughter, and I didn't want her to ever think I didn't feel that way about her.
She said it was FINE... she would work Thurs... it was not a big deal and I didn't do anything to discourage her from going...
But I STILL feel bad about this!!!
My goodness.
It's been a long time since I worked myself into a state over some silly something. I guess I was overdue.
Is this a silly something? I feel like if I mention it again, I'll just be making it worse, but I can't stand to think she might feel like I wanted us to go with ds by ourselves and leave her at home.
I'm such an idiot. I should have never offered an opinion at all. If she wanted to ask to change her schedule her first week of work, and if she wanted to be exhausted Friday & Saturday, what earthly concern should it be of mine. *sheesh*