Thanks for adopting us from SheForums

[Costumelady]

Thank you all for adopting us. I will introduce myself here. I got by Costumelady because for years I was a costume designer for theater, not any more but I kept the name. I was part of Sheforums for over 20 years since my 26 year old was 5 I believe. There are several of us with kids in close ages and we followed Roo to the Coffee House and have kept it going for years and years. My life journal is really in all of those posts so it is sad I will pretty much lose it when they are gone with only able to copy paste and I have only done some messages that way. It is still operational so I have had a hard time moving over here thought I did join in March. I too would love to be a member so I can do the Joys and Concern Board.

I turned 61 yesterday. I am married to a man whose name is Prince and I often call him that online or use P. We have been married for 31 almost 32 years. I truly am as in love with him as much or more than when we met. Together we have 2 sons and I had a son from a previous Marriage. N is 34 and is in a relationship in the Twin Cities, MN and he is an equity stage manager. C is 30 and just finishing his classwork for Bachelors degree in Education, he will be student teaching in the fall in Elementary Education , he wants a 4th grade class. R is 26 and he got his Bachelors last year but it having a horrible time getting even an interview let a lone a job in Cyber Security. He is going to have to take any job soon.

P is a software engineer for the DoD and travels a lot. I am an adult education teacher (GED teacher) for the last 23 years, this is my 37th year teaching and I am retiring May 23. I was just asked to come back part time in the fall to teach 1 class 4 afternoons a week for 4 - 7week sessions. I said I would love to. We have a mini dachshund who is 15 years old. We travel extensively. I have gotten to meet gma, mom, atlantic flyer, kittykatt, funmum, roo which is much of the Coffee House group. We are very active in our church - the Episcopal Church - P serves on numerous committees and is on the Vestry, I also serve on numerous committees, I am the Children's Chaplain, Sunday school teacher and Altar Guild and play in the bell choir. Together we are the coffee ministers, usher and acolyte.

Thanks the Sheforums and both ways of organizing along with my own spin, I have become very functional. My house stays tidy (much help to P and C, the neatniks of the family) bills stay paid, dishes, duds and dinner are done daily. I am married to my calendar and I have pretty much mastered my executive functioning skills. I do not know what retirement looks like but I have ideas.

I look forward to getting know know others. I hangout with the Triple Dog Dare group on occasions as well. I usually post 1 or 2 times a week or less depending on busy and kind of brain dump.

[lucylee]

Welcome, Costumelady!
I'm a retired teacher also -- 30 years, ninth grade English. I loved it, but I adjusted to retirement pretty quickly. Well, I don't know if that's a good way to put it -- I learned to really enjoy sleeping late and staying up late. So I'm not really all that productive, but house stays pretty tidy, and I try to keep up with the routines. DH was almost OCD about everything in its place and putting away things when he was finished with them, so as far as neatness goes, I have good habits. Deep cleaning, not so much.

This past year, I've mostly been working through adjusting to being alone -- dh passed away April 2024. It's really been an adjustment -- he was a retired teacher also, and we had been married 44 1/2 years. He had really been my best friend since I was 16.
We have one child, (41 years old, married) and two grandchildren. They live within a mile of my house, and my dmom is still living. She just turned 80 and has some health problems, but she still lives alone. She's about 10-15 minutes from me and I do help her out fairly often, but I'm not in the full time caretaker role at all.

Anyway -- I can imagine how hard it is to leave your old board, but welcome to our little neighborhood here!

[Costumelady]

Thanks Lucylee, I am so sorry to learn of your dh passing, I can't even imagine that pain. I go through a depressive sad stage everytime he goes on business travel. I can't sleep. I truly hate it and he travels more than I wish. But now I can travel with him so that will be my intent. He retires December 2027 but they have already suggested he come back as a contractor. You are lucky to have 2 grandkids close - my 3 boys though plenty old enough to have children do not. My oldest will probably not have children unless they surrogate or adopt and that is not interesting to either he or his partner. My middle one so wants to be a dad but hasn't had a date in 2 years and I really just want him to finish his student teaching first and then he can meet a nice teacher like him. My youngest dates more than his brother but no one serious at all and I want him to find a job - I think he is more apt to meet someone if he is working. It has been a frustrating year of trying and finding nothing in the field he studied for. At this point even if it is fast food, he needs a job. I need to find him a program that can help him find work.

C is the OCD son, he puts things away in places I can never discover. Drives me insane. DH is good at keeping his area tidy but not freaking because mine is never that tidy. R the youngerst is like I used to be - sometimes I can't see the floor in his room.

I do need to deal with clutter and weed things out of my house. Summer goal.

My plans for retirement is to get back to the Y in the mornings which I can continue when I go back in the fall. I do not know how to sleep in but I know how not to get out of bed. I wake at 5 am whether I want to or not.

[lucylee]

Thank you, CL.

My son had a room like that -- couldn't find the floor. He was so busy with sports, music, and making good grades that I finally gave up and let it all slide. Let me tell you, it doesn't get any better. LOL. He and ddil are perfectly matched in this department. They do NOT keep house like I do... but after having dgrands in my house for two days, I can kinda understand why. I used to try to "help" and offer suggestions, but I'm finally learning to just keep my mouth shut and be thankful for all the good things they do. Their 15th anniversary is this month. * That is hard to believe! Seems like just yesterday that these SHEs were assuring me that I was not going to lose a son, but I would gain a daughter, and they were totally right.

[Twins' Mom]

CostumeLady, come find us in the PWYC thread! So many similarities, tho my kids are older:

but hasn't had a date in 2 years

My twins at 32 don't date, never have. DD not interested in any romantic relationships, tho she has plenty of friends. DS works as engineer in auto manufacturing plant, not exactly a place to meet women. And he is a little OCD, while I would put her up against Lucylee's family any day in clutter/clothes etc. on floor/car/everywhere.

I'm so glad that we were able to open up for your group to join us.

[lucylee]

while I would put her up against Lucylee's family any day in clutter/clothes etc. on floor/car/everywhere.

LOL, Twins. We could also match your OCD son, Costume Lady! I often referred to my dh as "Sheldon" (Big Bang Theory) because of his OCD personality.

[Costumelady]

Twinsmom - I will come find you, I don't post but about once a week when I have some free time. I took the day off today and it is driving me crazy wondering what is happening in my class. I don't know how I am going to handle retirement but I think right now it is just trying to complete the school year successfully. My oldest in high school did not like to do laundry so he would just go to goodwill and buy clothes and not wash them and wear them and they would end up on his floor. I was worried we had mushrooms growing. His room stank so bad of body odor that I had a motion sensor airfreshener on the door outside of his room to spritz when he left his room. When he went to college I put my foot down and make him gather all of those clothes and had carpet cleaned and we went to laundromat, 20 loads of laundry at the laundromat - I made him pay but I helped wash and fold and he could fill 2 large suitcases with his favorite clothes and the rest were donated back to goodwill. He said why do I have to wash them?? !!!!! What you buy and wear off rack and your laundry stinks so bad they would just throw it away. I am happy to say he has outgrown this and keeps a relatively tidy house now, smells nice, and has clean clothes with his partner (I suspect his partner has more to do with this than son) in all of his years he has never bought me flowers at all and I got birthday and mother's day flowers from "them" but really partner which son admitted. I told him I loved R a lot. LOL

I laughed about the Sheldon husband - mine is not quite that bad but very routine driven and has his spot on the couch and table, clothes ordered in a certain way, very clean car ( mine is NOT) but oddly enought a messy desk and my middle son C is just like him but C is a bit of a germaphobe so cleans and sanitized a lot more -he was great during lockdown. I had to peel eggs the other day for deviled eggs for our mother's day brunch at church and he freaked out and got up and scoured the counter laid out towels and bowls and helped me peel sanitarily 2 dozen eggs. I appreciated that, I would have wiped up but not done all he did. He has a thing about a clean kitchen and empty sink.