Second Sunday of Advent

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

In the Western Christian church, Advent is the season of preparation. Not getting ready for Christmas, but getting ourselves ready for the second coming of Jesus.

This is supposed to be a solemn time (the liturgical colour is purple, the same as Lent.) It is a season of penitence in the Catholic tradition.

But the secular world has overwhelmed the season and it is hard to carve a time of personal reflection and spiritual preparation when in church while still living in the secular calendar which has Christmas music and decorations starting in November (or October!) It often gets interpreted as a preparation for Christmas and a way to stretch the season longer. Never matter that the season of Christmas is not a day but actually the time between Christmas Day and Epiphany.

One of my former ministers kept Christmas separate by having their full Christmas 'day' on the 12th day of Christmas. So December 25th was a feast (in old days people fasted through Advent) and stockings. Then one gift each day for the 12 days and then a bigger feast and more gifts on the 12th night. They didn't start their shopping until after (and got all the sales) and really stretched out the season so their son wasn't overwhelmed on the one day. I really admired how they worked a 'truce' between the secular and liturgical calendars.

So, one of the things I did yesterday was remove all my Christmas decorations from the church - I'll leave the ones the musician put up but I can't get her to understand what Advent is. I expect some flack from that this morning.

At home, I have the outside lights on (they help fight my SAD) and I'm working on Christmas cards. But the rest of the decorations are still in the basement. They'll be up later, about 2 weeks before or even later depending on my schedule. As a child, the decorations didn't go up until Dec. 24th (and then when I was older, the 23rd.) My mother's family had staff to put up the tree while they were at church on Christmas Eve (my grandfather was the organist, my grandmother the soloist) so that's where my family's tradition came from and I rebelled against that when I was a young adult and wanted to decorate really early. The compromise I made between Church and home was to wait until the second Sunday of Advent.

I never was able to switch our family over to our minister's traditions, although we do spread the season and our visiting as much as possible between Christmas and Epiphany (mainly to free up time to focus on church.)

But as I age, the early decorations aren't as important. People come first and I find I'm pulled in many directions as people find the holidays hard and need a sympathetic ear.

So I'm focusing on people at this point, as well as my own spiritual preparation.

So what are the roots of your holiday preparations? Twin's holidays float around (so do the Christian ones a little bit - advent started as early as it could this year but our end-date is always fixed.) That puts her out of synch with surrounding society. OKay has many, many, things to deal with that aren't Christmas. Elizabeth is one of many facing a new Christmas experience this year.

Do your holiday traditions fit in with society or are you trying to balance the conflict as well?

Remember, in this village, no matter how our preparations are going, we'll all put down the eggnog and the tinsel and come to your side if you need an ear.

So speak up, rant away, ask for a tissue or a silly joke if you need a smile, whatever you need when the season becomes overwhelming. We are always here and ready to offer whatever we can to support you.

[OKay]

Kathryn - Thank you for this well written opening. It brought tears to my eyes as I read it and is encouraging me to ponder on many of our Christmas traditions to find the real reason for doing them.

I'm up and going this morning. Have S2B including washing hair, Kitchen opened, LOL in dryer, Bible study/prayers done, LO learning pages for the day laid out, etc. I'm looking at our weather and adjusting the PM/AM chores for the extra work at MPB since it is now below freezing every night. They are predicting snow for us - but I am ignoring it and in denial because I really REALLY hate driving in the big city when the roads are bad.

After attending SS, then teaching little ones during church this morning, I will attend a silent auction and bid on a few things just because the proceeds go to help a family that has had a big loss. There have been several one-of-a-kind hand made items donated and I want to do my part in making sure they receive the bids they deserve. Afterwards we will come home for lunch and LO nap. I'm not absolutely sure which of us (DH or myself) will spend the rest of the day in the hospital - it depends on the weather, road conditions and a couple other factors. ....but one of us will make the 3 hour drive up/back later today to be with DBro and family.

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

((((OKay))))

I was thinking of LO and his clinging to you. I don't think it is because of your visits to the hospital so much as he's sensing the legal procedures. Children sense our concerns and feelings and react to them. There is nothing you can do to alleviate this, I just wanted to point out that I don't think it is the hospital visits that is making him cling.

Oh, and do cancel that medical procedure - you really don't need that additional stress right now and putting it off 30 or 60 days should not jeopardize your health in any way.

+++++++

I'm done my exercising and s2s. Ran over to the church and put the heat on. Said hi to God. Came home and lit my prayer candles. I've got a someone in my head and I don't know why and don't know if I should ask (not a close relationship so I don't know how to ask.)

I'm having tea and chocolate right now and planning out the week.

Monday and Wednesday I'm driving a friend to the hospital for treatments. I also have a dental appointment on Monday afternoon. Tuesday I have volunteering. Thursday and Friday are currently free. Since dh is in the city with me on Tuesday, I'll have to do my Christmas shopping then, or possibly the next week, although that's starting to look awful too.

[Harriet]

OKay, I immediately began going through your list to see what could be dropped and yes the colonoscopy should be postponed. To ME, the parties go to the bottom of the priorities, but I don't know whether you may have responsibilities there. (Occurs to me later you may mean your own family's party.) Is it at all possible to take LO along to be with his cousins, keeping him close, giving Mr. OKay repair time?

A pleasant morning for you, Lynlee. Nice to hear about it over here.

Thanks for sharing those thoughts, Kathryn. As a child, I don't believe secular Christmas and church Christmas differed much, and it was both because of a shorter calendar for secular Christmas and a very simple (what I would call) Scots/Presbyterian church calendar for all churches in our area then. The children's manger scene on the evening of the 24th was the cornerstone for all, advent wreaths were tiny. Over the years of my life, churches began to teach traditions of what a Methodist minister I worked for called "high church" and Advent became much more formally observed, with careful planning of who was to light which candle in the centrally important wreath.

I believe part of what is going on for Christmas as well as for other seasons is that, "A church is the only organization that is there for the benefit of the non-member." So churches embrace the secular observance partially to be inclusive and offer familiarity, so as to have a chance at all in society to be a Christmas voice. Right now as I type, there is a tree in my churches' sanctuary,and that would have been frowned upon in the past - only the fellowship halls had trees. (Actually, it was in the Methodist church I first encountered a phenomenon called "the hanging of the greens" in which the sanctuary was decorated with a tree.) My church gets around the awkwardness some people feel by making the tree an "angel tree" decorated partly with white cutouts of disadvantaged girls and boys with info on the back for donations. Of course, when I was younger, the church never confused people with angels; only the department stores that did that.

Thoughts on my own Christmas will have to wait - I realize that was your point!

We went to bed early enough to get a good night's sleep. Dstepson has this morning as his only time to help with some things HRH needs around here. HRH wants me to go on to church with dd, but someone needs to give attention to my ddad and that would be at the same time, so I am trying to figure this out.

My ddad, instead of sitting down to eat the breakfast he saw set out for him, has gone back to bed and to sleep without explanation, which has me worried. No matter what the reason, I know from experience this will lead to a less confident, less understandable day for him and by extension, us.

I may take dd to SS only.

[Sunny]

Good Morning. Thank you for the very interesting opening Kathryn.

Our Church (United Methodist) also has an Angel Tree in the Narthex and a box underneath for the donations. We also have a tree in the sanctuary decorated with only white lights and hand made Christian symbol decorations. At home our decorations usually go up two weeks before Dec. 25th and taken down about two weeks after. People here in the south tend to make the time shorter. It is very noticeable that a lot of decorations are gone the day after Christmas. I like to see the decorations up because, although the season has become materialistic through retailing, personally it reminds me of the real reason which is the birth of Jesus.

I'm almost ready to leave, just need to fix my lunch to take and let the dogs out one more time. They have been very quiet this morning!

See you all later this evening. Wishing a good day for all!

[Nancy]

Yea we have sunshine today! H. moaned and went back to bed he is not doing well still recuperating from aches and pains after working on Fri. My b.s. is great today. I've had cocoa with coconut milk in it yum. Trying to keep focused on the positive.

See J & C thread for teen & tween devo. ideas.

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

Back from church and lunch at the diner. We took 1:20 to get out of church (as caretakers we were the last to leave because we had to bring the garbage and lock up) so I agreed to the diner instead of coming home.

Turns out it is Christmas in the Market Town so there were pony rides at the diner and a horse drawn 'sleigh' for rides around the town. Plus Santa and Mrs. Claus showed up and there was a big wood fire outside the diner to roast marshmallows. The diner's owner was there (first time we've seen her since the summer) and she is doing the Christmas dinner for everyone this year. So that puts a wrinkle in our day. Dh really wants to go. I do too, except the kids are home (and in ds's case, awake.) Plus we have church until noon to fit in. Will discuss this with the kids.

Ds is over now and preparing to climb the tower (or dh will.) The location of the installation of the outdoor sensors for the weather station didn't work well - it is reading 2 degrees too high because it is next to the asphalt roof. And the wind reads too low because it is blocked by the cedar hedge. So up onto the tower it will go. Dh meant to move it in the spring but ds is here now and happens to have his gear so we'll move it now and have accurate wind readings (important for our walks in the winter.)

Then they'll watch a movie in the basement and I'll watch a movie up here. I just got the ink into the colour laser printer and wound the clocks so two chores are done. Next up, plug in my cell phone!

[OKay]

Home from church. Time with the little ones went as smoothly as it could. I bid on a few items that hadn't received any bids at the silent auction, but then the bids started happening fast and the prices on everything went high. I stopped bidding because I didn't really want anything, I just wanted to honor the people who donated items to make sure their effort/donation brought a good price. We have already given to the family-in-need so that aspect had already been taken care of.

I just checked the weather forecast and it is going to be a few hours before the moisture arrives (rain then snow) so i'm going to make the trip to the big city. If DBro continues to be stable, I plan to come home before the roads get bad. DSIL rented an apartment near the hospital instead of continuing to stay in a hotel, so i do have a place to stay if the weather moves in faster than expected.

[Nancy]

Lunch is soup change of plan dinner is thawing chicken breast to share it was a big one. I've done my 4 mi. on the ex. bike.

It's not going to be very warm today here so I'm kind of hibernating inside. Journaling is done. I've been enjoying reading all your posts!

Raised Presbyterian we observed advent.

[lucylee]

Count me in as another Methodist w/Hanging of the Greens & Advent wreath, etc. in our sanctuary. Growing up Baptist, I had no idea what Advent WAS until I married dh, but I like the observance (even though I did not attend the Hanging of the Greens service). It does sorta make one focus on The Reason for the Season... and helps us slow down a tiny bit, even if it is only for that one hour on Sunday morning.

I would LOVE to follow the Advent calendar here at home, too, and get our tree & decorations up on that first Sunday... but, pardon my grammar, that ain't happening. Not happening on the second Sunday, either, I can tell you.
MAYBE next weekend. I would REALLY, REALLY like to have the tree up at least two weeks before, and leave it up till New Year's Day, at least, and maybe till Epiphany... but this year, I have just been TOTALLY overwhelmed, it seems.

When I was growing up, I think we followed the same sort of schedule, tried to have the tree up at least two weeks before Christmas, but dmom -- being a SUPER "sidetracked" home executive -- had her own issues with following a rigid schedule for this, too, LOL. We always opened ONE gift on Christmas Eve, Santa came & we got gifts from him & from parents on Christmas morning. We went to dmom's parents on Saturday or Sunday before Christmas and ddad's parents on Christmas Day.
We always had the Christmas cantata at church, and probably a churchwide "fellowship supper," etc... but no formal observance of Advent.

We have a LOT of activities going on at church now, but sad to say, I/my parents were MUCH more involved in church growing up than dh & I are now. I just don't feel the same connection w/my church family today that I did with the one I was born into, and I guess that's only natural -- especially when I'm not really making the effort to reach out to some of these people, either. I just felt like I had more in common with the group I grew up with. I know that's partly my own insecurities talking, though, b/c I do have a LOT in common with a lot of the ladies in my church today... I'm just too self-conscious and agoraphobic and anxiety-prone today to get involved with anyone, really.

As far as family activities go, we follow about the same pattern now that I did then. We'll have Christmas Eve w/dinlaws, Christmas breakfast w/my parents, then Christmas Day dinner w/ddad's side of the family. We'll probably wait till that night for ds & ddil to come back to our house for presents w/us.
Ds & ddil go to her parents on weekends before Christmas. They were supposed to go two weekends in a row, but she decided to skip one set of grandparents b/c she didn't think she could get off both weekends.

Changing the subject a little bit, I must clarify something. I said last night I was so proud of myself for getting so much of my shopping done. I must give credit where credit is due: I actually prayed about my shopping before I went into the stores, and I truly do believe that God granted my prayer for wisdom and good decision making in the process. It was Friday night, but the stores were not crowded at all, salespeople were helpful, and I lucked into an unadvertised 20% off @ Belk for using my charge card. That was a WONDERFUL surprise blessing.

Well... I need my nap. Also have MUCH to do around here. Need to deliver oranges (school fruit sale) to dparents. * sigh *
Brain is on overload. I need a nap.

The Giver is a good book, as I recall, Harriet. Too bad it has caused such chaos for everyone.

(((OKay))) for ALL you're dealing with, especially concerns for dbro.

(((Harriet))) for concerns re: ddad.

Waving to Sunny... Nancy... & Kathryn.