Tuesday TA DA tally!

[Ramblinrose]

Hugs to all that need one… or two

Working with a headache, this is getting old

LadyM… I had several kids like you daughter that didn’t like change. Really for them it was fear.. I had a boy that had two years! of papers in his backpack and wouldn’t let my go through it. After a discussion with him he was able he was afraid he would loose all those papers. Course he really didn’t need them but they were his security “blankets” and was just very afraid he would loose them because they were so important to him.

This fear was very real to him so instead of trying to convince him those papers didn’t matter I told him I totally understood. I had an empty drawer in my filing cabinet that sat behind his desk. We, he and I, took all the papers, looked through them, and placed them in the drawer.

I told him any time he got scared that they were lost to him, he could come into my class and check to make sure they were ok and still there. I then game him a pass to give to his teachers he could come to me whenever he needed. He was hesitant to begin with, but was willing to try. As much as he was scared to give up his papers, he loved how light his backpack was.

He came to me several times during the week even though he had class with me every day. Once he became convinced his precessions were safe, the fear eased for him, but in the beginning that fear was very strong

Perhaps this is the way your daughter feels. Can you find boxes that she can decorate that will hold her prize possessions? Then can you either stack them in her room or some place close by so they will become her touch stones? Having taught kids like her I know their fear is very real. M

I have found several solutions like this for some of my other kids. I hated to see the terroir in their eyes when we first confronted their fears. I bet giving your daughter control over her things are will be helpful for her. It may be her fear of abandonment that is keeping her from letting go of those things that are important to her.

[Harriet]

lucylee, we posted at same time and I had to ignore yours and repost in order to meet the delivery in the driveway. I do want to say that by its very definition, down time means that you are not up and doing. You are taking some down time, so if you don't decide on something to do, then you must be doing it right. Selfishly, I would like to think of you doing some little creative thing and then looking forward to doing it again. I'd feel better. (smile - I told you, selfishly) But you are you and if you are not ready to ADD in anything yet, you're not ready. I know you enjoyed getting photo albums ready. Was that more in the form of a chore so as not to lose them? Or more because it was happy-making? I know you have enjoyed journaling. Has that had any aspect of creative journaling or more for organizing thoughts? Have you thought (ever - even years back) of something to do/create/prepare for Christmas just for the love of Christmas? I'm not asking what you want for Christmas - completely different and you probably don't want anything. But something you thought of in the Deck the Halls, ring-ting-tingle-ing, secret Kringle, betcha-didn't-expect-that kind of way? Would your enjoyment of "Walk-Away" times ever grow into a desire for a distance goal, a jogging goal, a local charity walk/run?

We wore ourselves out proving the advertising of how EASY this daybed is to put together is boloney. But we did it. Also curtains up. They look more vinyl-like and less soft than I'd hoped, but I think the wrinkles need to fall out (room-darkening). We're pleased that there is going to be good storage space under the daybed. Neither of us is ready to start the project of moving the chest of drawers in yet.

[lucylee]

Thank you, Harriet. I guess I just don't have the energy to enjoy anything right now. DGD and I did sort a new shipment of photos last night/this morning. I had ordered six months' worth of photos from Shutterfly, and we put them in chronological order. I have a whole box of 2023 photos that need to be organized. BUT -- I also need to get new photo albums before I start on this. And the photo books are taking up an unreal amount of space. I love having them in albums -- it's so much easier to look back and find one if you're looking for a specific picture, and they stay in order. BUT... I'm thinking already, WHERE IN THE WORLD is DS going to be able to store these some day when they become his???

And yes, I'd like to do some writing -- and DS would like me to do some writing. They gave me one of those "grandmother remembers" books for Mother's Day. I also have the beginning of a novel in my Word files. I really doubt I'd ever have the courage to actually submit it to someone, but it's there, and it's based on my great-grandmother's life.

But right now, after having dgrands (one at a time, mostly) for 4 days/nights... I just tend to spend the other three days lying on the couch (in dh's spot) and watching TV.
I'm about to go out and eat with DS and dgrands. DDIL is working tonight. Usually when she's working, the rest of us go out together. When she's home, she cooks, or they do family stuff.

I enjoy playing the piano. (I guess I should say ATTEMPTING to play the piano. I need lots of practice.)

I think I'm kinda using summer to just try to readjust myself to this new reality... I know when the kids start back to school, I'll have a lot more alone time, and maybe I can get into a new routine then.

WTG to you and HRH on getting the bed put together!

(((Gentle Hugs))) to you, too, Rose. I know you must have been a phenomenal teacher! That was such a wonderful solution for the student who couldn't let go of his papers. Saying a prayer for Sweetie to qualify for the new med!

Doing my walking routine, even as small as it is, would probably help my mood. As Kathryn advised some time ago, walking outside is a good re-set... but it's "feels like 98 out there right now. Dew point 71.

(((BIG HUGS))) for you, LadyM. You continue to amaze me with how you manage your days inspite of what frustrations you may be facing. You must be a lot like my daunt... and that is about the highest praise I can give anyone!
Nancy, you are also an inspiration to me! You are doing so well these days. Maybe I'm expecting too much of myself at three months?

Twins, I don't blame you for being in a mood! The Fitbit loss of info is enough to make anyone mad... and then the azaleas!!! Remember how upset my dmom was when my uncle pruned hers at the wrong time of year? Goodness. Hang in there.

Hmmm... Cathy... that is something to think about... do they say what the specific chores are?

6 Daily chores
10 Weekly chores
4 Monthly chores
6 Quarterly chores.

Gotta go -- DS will be waiting on me.

[Twins' Mom]

Remember how upset my dmom was when my uncle pruned hers at the wrong time of year? Goodness. Hang in there.

Lucylee, I'm right there with your mom!

[CathyS]

LucyLee I didn't write any down, but they gave some suggestions that I do remember.

Daily ~ do dishes, load/unload dishwasher, shine kitchen sink, wipe kitchen table, wipe kitchen counters, sweep/vacuum/mop kitchen floor, scrub stovetop.

Weekly ~ clean microwave, clean fridge, wash bed sheets, dust, clean pet dishes, clean toilet, mop floors, put out garbage

I can't remember any others.

So... "they" (all local weather forecasters on tv and FBook) are giving numerous warnings regarding the rain expected tomorrow... "Up to 50 millimeters!" So, I asked Google how much that is. Less than 2 inches. I think I'm safe to still go out.

[Nancy]

I have looked and the colored fleece is not in the most obvious places.
I have a suspicion that I spun it up and wound it into balls. /
never mind I round it!

Thanks LucyL.
I am not comfortable driving alone and a bit envious of your excursions I must admit.
Except in the town I live.
There are so many wrecks on fb. sigh

Today it's just too dang hot. 103* here now.
Not really hungry and do not feel like cooking had a cheese & tomato San for lunch missed the bacon on it! LOL!
I have bacon and toms so may do that for dinner.

I used to drive in the next town before but these days not much need for that I did it to get out of the house.
My walks and gardening work for that for me these days. I also do not want to leave the dog.
Might need a bathroom....

In the beginning I was going to this place and that to check off places I could say I have been alone after LH passed.
Then after that no real reason to go here or there and the fav. cafe' closed not so much fun alone.
Plus there is always stuff to do around here weeding watering cleaning ...

Looking for my Summer slacks capris or what ever with out success too.
I have one pr. but no pockets in em.

[lucylee]

Well, Nancy, I haven't made many (any?) excursions on my own. I'm always with DS and the grands. I don't mind driving around our little Tiny Town, or even Next Town, on my own, but ooohh... I can't tell you how much I dread football season. For the first time in my life I'll be driving almost 4 hours away, without another licensed driver. Dgrands will be with me for moral support and companionship, but it will all depend on ME. I am really nervous about that, but I really want to keep up the football weekends for dgrands. DS will probably be able to go sometimes, but there will be lots of weekends when he is working and it will be just up to me.

On another subject -- Do y'all think this is okay -- before dh passed away, we ate out with ds and family a LOT, and dh always paid. Well, DS and DDIL know I am worried about finances now, and they know my income has dropped about 40% -- so now when we go out, I let DS pay occasionally, maybe half the time. I try to alternate with him. Tonight he paid, and I left the tip. I hate to not be able to do everything like dh did, and I know the Lord is trying to tell me (through the Bible readings/devotionals I mentioned the early day) that I shouldn't worry about money... but I'm still trying to be frugal, you know? I haven't gotten through the insurance bills that will be coming and the football ticket order. I think after I get through the first year, and some of these one-time expenses, like the tombstone, I will feel better.

[Harriet]

lucylee, it's nice to just think through the things you enjoy in life even if you're not ready for some of them, or never feel strongly enough about them to go further. So unusual that RIGHT as I was posting to you, finishing up, the phone had rung and HRH had answered a call from the widow of his former assistant manager. For five years they ran a 200-person food plant together, high pressure but with totally random needs every day, too. They had so many stories together. His assistant was a great friend through the years. He passed away more than a year ago, and his widow was just calling HRH to get to hear from someone who had known her dh, could talk with her again about his wonderful qualities, how capable a person he was, etc. She just missed having knowledgeable conversations about him. So don't think you are on some timetable or slower than others in needing down time and time to think through the loss. Everybody takes time and has a lot of pensive moments.

Took trash and most recyclables to the cans (I forgot some recyclables for some reason). Really bulky things are gone. Kitty potty chores had also gotten done earlier.

HRH decided on a chair for the small bedroom and realized he let the tv he meant to put in there go with dd for her studio! We made the day bed up with an inexpensive bedspread that looks like a quilt but is not really one - just a quilt-print. Looks very homey but will stand up to hard wear without making me nervous over an actual quilt.

He's torn about buying a tv now. He just agonized over a computer for the den and took months to buy - it hasn't even arrived yet. Not really important - the good kind of problems, and no one else would even realize we haven't furnished the room exactly as we'd planned.

We had basil pesto this evening for an easy meal 'cause we were bushed. I've already finished in the kitchen.