FLYing Friday

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

Flylady's name came from fly-fishing, but she set FLY to mean:

Finally Loving Yourself

That concept I've found enlightening over the years.

Pam and Peggy understood they weren't like 'other' people. It is interesting that over the years, with the introduction of computers and phones and the internet that the ranks of those who are easily distracted are rising so we aren't as much of an outlier as we used to be. But the truth is that most expectations, learning methods, time management methods, and life-management methods are designed by people whose brains work differently than ours.

When they wrote From Pigpen to Paradise, ADHD wasn't really understood or diagnosed. And especially not in adults. Sure there were always physically hyper kids (mostly boys) in our classes and many were on meds, but the idea that especially girls brains were as hyper as the boys bodies were was a foreign concept when I was in school. So I was distracted, not ADHD because I was not running all over the place or jumping off desks, disrupting the class.

Pam and Peggy were life-shifting for me. I had never felt 'seen' but anecdote after anecdote let me know they too experienced my clash of intentions and focus; my love of embracing the world getting in the way of getting me and my kid out the door to playgroup.

It is logical there weren't many books or systems to turn to in the early 1980s. Side-tracked people may not be able to get their act together enough to have a system to share. And even if they do, they may not be able to promote/publish that system because of how easily distracted they are.

That Pam and Peggy were able to do so was a HUGE blessing for me. I was finally no longer alone, wondering why I couldn't do the simple things people who were much less smart than me could do.

Perhaps I missed the focus on accepting ourselves in my first implementation of the SHE system. I got the book from the La Leche League group library and only had it for a month to read and implement while trying to parent a 7 month old, and I know I missed the part about PUPA every night! Maybe there was a piece about loving oneself in there.

But Marla added that piece for me, embracing who I was and learning to work with those gifts instead of focusing on the gifts I didn't have. By then, I was also dealing with ds's dyslexia and the program we were following also focused on the gift of dyslexia, something to be used rather than something to be fixed.

After my concussion, when the post-concussion depression settled in, brought on by my inability to focus enough to work with my gifts as I had for 3+ decades, I told the doctor that I used to like my brain and how it worked even though I wasn't 'normal' and I no longer liked it, or myself. That's why I chose to start ADD meds instead of the offered meds for depression. And that's what flipped a switch for me (although that switch is hair-trigger now, thanks to the pandemic and depression is always lurking.)

That's when I realized how important the Finally Loving Yourself piece of the P&P/Flylady system is.

There are an awful lot of challenges in the village right now, so I hope that all of you are at least able to say you love yourselves. If not, that might be where you need to put your focus with those few minutes you have each day for yourself.

[Kathryn-in-Canada]

My ADD meds are in me because the next 72 hours will be hectic.

Ds is coming by with dgs this morning and dd will come over with dgs6 and dgd4 in the afternoon and staying for dinner. She'll take dgd home and I'll have the two cousins for overnight. A treat for dgs6 and regular babysitting for dgs1.8. He'll leave in the afternoon on Saturday, being moved over to his other grandparents' home since they want a turn with him (but can only babysit on weekends because they are still working outside the home.) I'll keep dgs6 for only a short bit after that before taking him home. His parents want him around for at least some of the weekend.

My Sunday is busy with church in the morning, I'm ushering and serving communion, and then a meeting in the afternoon planning the upcoming residents' association events.

I have 4 pills left of my ADD meds but a phone call doctor appointment this morning to get a refill so that should be fine.

So, poof! Away I go. I'm showering a day early so I don't have to shower tomorrow morning. And then I'll get as much work done on the residents' association stuff as possible before the distractions arrive.

[Twins' Mom]

I'm working on cleaning up for dcleaning lady. After that, I'll see how energetic I feel about the rest of the day. Dh invited ds over for our dinner tonight and took already cooked brisket out of the freezer, so I just have to provide sides. (What?)


Update: Primary bedroom and bath are done. That was the biggest mess, because I've tried on things and not put them back, or laid clean clothes there "to put away" and then didn't, and generally let things accumulate on flat surfaces. She usually starts in there. I started a load of laundry earlier, but bed is stripped and sheets will go in next. Rest of the house is presentable, if not altogether neat.

[Harriet]

We had another furniture-moving night around here. I awakened at 3 and knew I heard something, even though he was trying to keep the bedroom door closed and be quiet. I came out and he looked up and grinned and said, "busted!" And believe it or not he'd been messaging with a friend who couldn't sleep either and was out on a walk with his dog. Men have just as hard a time with good sleep patterns as we do.

All my extra laundry loads have been handled and I can take some drip-dries down now.
Yet another piece of Desk Day has become important. Sigh. If I keep going like this, when I get to actual Desk Day I'll be all finished.
Declutter looms large today. (I guess that's a given)
And I guess there are spaces along the baseboards that will be easy to clean today.

[Lady Maverick]

~~~Waving Hello to everyone~~~~

Kathryn - Thank you for the start and confirmation that I'm okay even though my brain marches to its own drummer.

I was relieved when I woke up this morning and realized I had an excellent night sleep. DS14 had another 14 year old male here last night and I wondered if I would be able to get a good night sleep with their high energy and loud voices. Even though the boys were up and active for hours after I went to bed, they didn't wake me. This morning I found the garage rearranged (they were using the open space to play virtual reality with oculus) and the kitchen had the remains of their cooking and feeding themselves.

DS14 has left for work and his friend went home to sleep more.

DD11 has asked to go shopping. She typically HATES to shop so this is a surprising & a bit shocking request. Next week is homecoming week at school and part of that celebration is themed days. Monday = Pajama Day, Tuesday = Superhero, Wednesday = Neon Day, Thursday = Wildcat (school mascot). I asked DD11 to decide what articles of clothing she needed for each of the days, and we would make it happen. Both of us are stumped for ideas on how to dress for Superhero day. No masks are allowed, and the store Halloween costumes are long gone.

Today is #9 of 12 monthly infusion therapy shots for me. DH will go with me just in case I have a reaction.

[CathyS]

I had a very hard time getting to sleep last night. I worked at tidying the library yesterday, and part of that was moving my recliner so I could get at the shelves that go from P to Z. I've been wanting to get some books shelved for a very long time.

We are having chicken drumsticks for supper with potatoes. I haven't decided on how to do the potatoes yet.

With today being "F" jobs, I swept and washed the floors. I know one thing... I have more water on the floor when I mop then the cleaning lady did. She went through the motions, but didn't do a very good job. Because our floors have radiant heat, they felt too warm for me this morning, so I knew the floors would dry quickly.

Dh has 2 customers this morning, so he isn't in the way or watching every move I make. (Not in a bad way, he just watches because, as he says... "Sometimes I can't believe we found each other again.")

I made blackberry ice cream today because blackberries were on sale this week at 1 of the stores we go to. It is a test run to see whether we like it or not. We have 1 blackberry bush in the back yard and when it's time to harvest, it's hard to keep up! The birds help, but there are so many berries.

[MysteryWoman]

Good morning!

I couldn’t tell you how many books I have/had on the subject of organization, but P&P are the only one that’s stuck. I imagine some of that’s due to this community and the old “red dress” community. Thank you!

Have fun with the grands, Kathryn!

How did the seminar go, Twins? I can’t imagine a 200-page syllabus! I hope it included plenty of examples.

I still need to make that pound cake. I don’t know about the matcha being “sophisticated,” Harriet. I just was looking for something that would go with our Japanese dinner — though I suppose I could make scones or something similarly British to go with our mystery. No strychnine, though! Anyhow, I’ve been a sucker for matcha flavor since we visited DSIL in SoCal before we had kids, and I had green tea ice cream. Mmm….

LadyM, how about a cloth cape and underwear on the outside?

Cathy, that’s so sweet, the story of your DH watching you.

I hope Dee and DH have gotten some good news from the cardiologist this morning.

And I hope blessed’s family arrangements (I don’t know how else to put it) all work out smoothly and for the best.

I think I will go start a load of wash, then bring up the butter, milk, and eggs on my way back upstairs. Have a wonderful day, all of you and all who come after!

[blessedw2]

I am waving to each and everyone of you! I want you to know I am thinking of all of you.

I did have lots of thoughts and worries yesterday and today I am hoping to handle one thing and only one thing at time.

I will have girls see dh today instead of my going there.
I am light headed today.

I ordered a few groceries. not much.
hoping to make INA'S greek panzanella salad for dinner and pre cook or cut up some veg for the next couple days

[Nancy]

LM I am thinking of Cat woman face paint whiskers could work with a black outfit, also capes came to mind!

I am up and have had breakfast did qt & journaling before bed is made.
I slept well bs was up ^.

br-r 27* - 41* today's forecast temps. / Sunny out now. I enjoyed the sunrise.
On track with my steps 870 @ nearly nine have been up since 6:30 slept well & had good dreams.

[blessedw2]

hope to work with you all.
I have been at the basic stage again:
first trash/put away for 15 minutes each room.

I need one more thing for tomorrows dinner.